Underwear

Add this to the list of dangers facing Baltimore, a city councilwoman says: baggy, saggy pants. Councilwoman Helen L. Holton has introduced a resolution to implore the city's youths to pull up their trousers, becoming the most recent in a string of lawmakers around the country who want to teach the next generation how to dress. Their efforts underscore the discomfort many adults feel about exposed underwear, although opponents think attempts to legislate fashion are a waste of time. Several towns in Louisiana have passed ordinances that carry fines for people exposing their underwear in public.

The ladies who lunch at Petit Louis in Roland Park know enough to keep their undies to themselves. Same goes for the Harbor East crowd forking over hundreds for dinner at Charleston and the oenophiles tasting wines at nearby Cinghiale. Patrons of Pazo, however, need to be told. Cindy Wolf and Tony Foreman have lots of restaurants in Baltimore, but only one with a dress code. It's just been posted inside the doorway at Pazo in Fells Point. It lists run-of-the-mill no-nos: No ball caps, athletic shoes, flip-flops.

To heck with good-luck chain letters. Who believes in them, anyway? Judy Mendoza breaks them about as often as the moon is full, with no apparent side effects."

JUDGE THOMAS, in a speech you delivered in 1987, you said, and I quote: 'I believe it is the responsibility of every decentperson to wear clean underwear, so that in the event of an accident, you will not be embarrassed in front of the nurses in the emergency room.' Is that quotation accurate?""Yes, senator, it is.""Now, you went on to say that if a person does not have an automatic washer and dryer, that person should wash his or her underwear by hand. And if that person does not have hot water, he or she should make do with cold water.

Like most articles of fashion, the union suit -- you do remember the union suit, don't you? -- has undergone an evolution over the decades.The union suit of the 1880s, when it was invented, was a one-piece men's or boys' underwear made by uniting the undershirt to the drawers. Sleeves and legs could be long or short. It was basic underwear, complete with drop seat.By 1940, the union had been divided and conquered by separate undershirts and boxer shorts, and it joined the endangered list.

I AM STARING now at a picture in a magazine of two women standing on what appears to be, oh, a hotel balcony.One woman is pointing off in the distance. The other is laughing uproariously, obviously delighted at a witticism uttered by her companion, unless I'm reading too much into this.What makes the picture so unsettling (at least to me) is that both women are dressed only in their underwear. Bras and panties, that's it. Maybe they're wearing shoes -- there's some sort of huge fern at their feet and you really can't tell.

Dear Cheryl, In response to your June 5 column: Yes, more and more men are thinking about their underwear these days. There are so many options! I would think that most women must be loving all the styles, fabrics and colors that are available to choose from. Plus, it's fun, sexy and exciting to wear something other than boring white boxers or briefs. Do women care about a man's underwear? -- Curious in Baltimore Dear Curious: Do fish swim? Is Ed Burns the hottest man alive? Are Pam Anderson's goods fake?

The choice was not between Batman and Superman. It wasn't even between the Caped Crusader and an X-person. No, it wasn't a superhero-superhero fight. Bruce Wayne's alterego just barely beat out a daytime TV talkshow host. It was either Batman undies or Ellen Degeneres-themed briefs, said Mark Harvey, the truck driver who ran out onto the field during the Orioles' opening home game. The 26-year-old Severn man originally planned to wear "ellen" undershorts for the diamond dash, Harvey said Thursday afternoon.

UNION BRIDGE -- Less than 24 hours into his new job as sewer operator, Fred Haifley was introduced to the intricacies of extricating underwear from the town pumps."

It's white, cotton, standard, basic, dependable -- and boring.It's men's underwear.Until now, shopping for men's undergarments has been about as exciting as trying out a "new and improved" brand of laundry detergent.But things are changing in the realm of men's foundations. This doesn't just involve the latest printed silk boxers, but rather an evolution of the product and expansion of the market.Manufacturers and designers such as Calvin Klein, Jockey International, Franco Moschino, Gianni Versace, Gianfranco Ferre and others recently have developed new lines of men's fashion underwear in a variety of styling, detailing, fabric, pattern and color.