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By MIKE ROYKO | December 23, 1994
Mike Royko is on vacation. In his absence, we are reprinting some of his favorite columns. This column first appeared on Dec. 26, 1969. Those of us who grew up in a big city can sometimes feel we missed out on the typical American Christmas.The schoolbooks always showed it in a setting where people got syrup from maple trees, took sleigh rides, cut their own Christmas tree in the forest and cooked in big farm kitchens.Yet, you never read the reminiscences of somebody like my friend Slats Grobnik.
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NEWS
By MIKE ROYKO | February 17, 1995
Pointing at the TV set, Slats Grobnik said: "Why's Dan Quayle giving us such a line of baloney?"What baloney? The man very forthrightly says he isn't going to run for president."
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FEATURES
By Mike Royko and Mike Royko,Tribune Media Services | January 15, 1992
Mike Royko is on vacation. During his absence, we are reprinting some of his favorite columns. This column first ran in 1981.HARDLY A DAY PASSES without a new book being published on exercise and physical fitness. Authors of these books, male and female and debatable, turn up on the TV shows to flex themselves and demonstrate methods for staying young, fit, and boring.But despite the national craze for daily strenuous exercise, many people still refuse to take part.You mention jogging, the most popular form of exercise, and they say: "I hate running."
NEWS
By MIKE ROYKO | December 23, 1994
Mike Royko is on vacation. In his absence, we are reprinting some of his favorite columns. This column first appeared on Dec. 26, 1969. Those of us who grew up in a big city can sometimes feel we missed out on the typical American Christmas.The schoolbooks always showed it in a setting where people got syrup from maple trees, took sleigh rides, cut their own Christmas tree in the forest and cooked in big farm kitchens.Yet, you never read the reminiscences of somebody like my friend Slats Grobnik.
FEATURES
By Mike Royko and Mike Royko,Tribune Media Services | November 25, 1991
SLATS GROBNIK tossed the magazine over his shoulder. Then he leaned on the bar, shook his head and muttered: "Enough, already."I retrieved the magazine, which was People, and asked him what it was that disturbed him.Slats pointed to the cover and the headline that said: "We believe in MAGIC: America finds a hero." Next to it was a picture of a smiling Magic Johnson."What is this hero stuff?" Slats said.Well, you can't deny that for someone so young, vital and successful to be afflicted with a deadly virus, he took it with uncommon courage, grace and dignity.
FEATURES
By Mike Royko | June 14, 1991
(Mike Royko is on vacation until June 17. While he is away, we are reprinting some of his favorite columns. This one was published in the Chicago Tribune March 17, 1987.)ONE OF MY FONDEST curbstone theories has recently been confirmed by genuine scientific research.It has to do with why some people are chronically grouchy and depressed while others are always bubbling with enthusiasm and looking at the bright side of life.A psychologist took a close look at students who fell into both groups.
FEATURES
By Mike Royko and Mike Royko,Tribune Media Services | October 5, 1990
IF YOU ASK ME," said Slats Grobnik, "that woman sportswriter got what she deserved when the guy waved his whatsis at her in the locker room."I didn't ask you."Then ask me and I'll tell you."You already did."Oh. Yeah, I guess I did. What I mean is, she brought the whole thing on herself. If she hadn't been there, it wouldn't have happened, would it?"If we weren't sitting here having a beer, we wouldn't be sitting here having a beer, would we?"I don't understand what that means."I don't either.
FEATURES
By Mike Royko and Mike Royko,Tribune Media Services | January 27, 1992
Mike Royko is on vacation. In his absence, we are reprinting some of his favorite columns. This column first appeared in 1987. THE WORLD OF SCIENCE is delirious with excitement over the discovery of new, efficient ways to get electricity from here to there. Or there to here, I suppose.It's said that these recent discoveries will have an enormous impact on the economy and our lifestyles and make possible all sorts of wondrous technological advances.One scientist was quoted as saying about the rapid development and potential of the new electrical conductors: "Nothing like this has ever happened in science before."
FEATURES
By Mike Royko and Mike Royko,Tribune Media Services | October 1, 1990
YOU KNOW WHAT'S great about Americans?" asked Slats Grobnik. "We're so cool, that's what."What prompts that proud observation?"Well, just listen to what people are talking about."
FEATURES
By Mike Royko and Mike Royko,Tribune Media Services | December 7, 1990
YOU KNOW WHAT'S great about Americans?" asked Slats Grobnik. "We're so cool, that's what."What prompts that proud observation?"Well, just listen to what people are talking about."
NEWS
By MIKE ROYKO | January 25, 1993
Glaring at President Clinton on the TV screen, Slats Grobnik said: "He blew his big chance."How can you say that? While it wasn't a great inauguration speech, he kept it short and to the point."
FEATURES
By Mike Royko and Mike Royko,Tribune Media Services | January 27, 1992
Mike Royko is on vacation. In his absence, we are reprinting some of his favorite columns. This column first appeared in 1987. THE WORLD OF SCIENCE is delirious with excitement over the discovery of new, efficient ways to get electricity from here to there. Or there to here, I suppose.It's said that these recent discoveries will have an enormous impact on the economy and our lifestyles and make possible all sorts of wondrous technological advances.One scientist was quoted as saying about the rapid development and potential of the new electrical conductors: "Nothing like this has ever happened in science before."
FEATURES
By Mike Royko and Mike Royko,Tribune Media Services | January 15, 1992
Mike Royko is on vacation. During his absence, we are reprinting some of his favorite columns. This column first ran in 1981.HARDLY A DAY PASSES without a new book being published on exercise and physical fitness. Authors of these books, male and female and debatable, turn up on the TV shows to flex themselves and demonstrate methods for staying young, fit, and boring.But despite the national craze for daily strenuous exercise, many people still refuse to take part.You mention jogging, the most popular form of exercise, and they say: "I hate running."
FEATURES
By Mike Royko and Mike Royko,Tribune Media Services | November 27, 1991
POLITICS is a rough game. And Mario Cuomo is seeing a preview of what he might be up against if he runs for president.He has already been accused by some Republicans of being named Mario.There is no way Cuomo can deny it. It's right there on his birth certificate and other official documents.His name was first raised as an issue by Sen. Phil Gramm, who said: "We don't have many Marios down there" (in Texas).This was taken by pundits to mean that someone with a foreign-sounding name like Mario would be viewed with suspicion by Texas guys named Bart, Clint, Bubba or Tex.Then came Vice President Dan Quayle.
FEATURES
By Mike Royko and Mike Royko,Tribune Media Services | November 25, 1991
SLATS GROBNIK tossed the magazine over his shoulder. Then he leaned on the bar, shook his head and muttered: "Enough, already."I retrieved the magazine, which was People, and asked him what it was that disturbed him.Slats pointed to the cover and the headline that said: "We believe in MAGIC: America finds a hero." Next to it was a picture of a smiling Magic Johnson."What is this hero stuff?" Slats said.Well, you can't deny that for someone so young, vital and successful to be afflicted with a deadly virus, he took it with uncommon courage, grace and dignity.
FEATURES
By Mike Royko | June 14, 1991
(Mike Royko is on vacation until June 17. While he is away, we are reprinting some of his favorite columns. This one was published in the Chicago Tribune March 17, 1987.)ONE OF MY FONDEST curbstone theories has recently been confirmed by genuine scientific research.It has to do with why some people are chronically grouchy and depressed while others are always bubbling with enthusiasm and looking at the bright side of life.A psychologist took a close look at students who fell into both groups.
NEWS
By MIKE ROYKO | February 17, 1995
Pointing at the TV set, Slats Grobnik said: "Why's Dan Quayle giving us such a line of baloney?"What baloney? The man very forthrightly says he isn't going to run for president."
FEATURES
By Mike Royko and Mike Royko,Tribune Media Services | November 27, 1991
POLITICS is a rough game. And Mario Cuomo is seeing a preview of what he might be up against if he runs for president.He has already been accused by some Republicans of being named Mario.There is no way Cuomo can deny it. It's right there on his birth certificate and other official documents.His name was first raised as an issue by Sen. Phil Gramm, who said: "We don't have many Marios down there" (in Texas).This was taken by pundits to mean that someone with a foreign-sounding name like Mario would be viewed with suspicion by Texas guys named Bart, Clint, Bubba or Tex.Then came Vice President Dan Quayle.
FEATURES
By Mike Royko and Mike Royko,Tribune Media Services | December 7, 1990
YOU KNOW WHAT'S great about Americans?" asked Slats Grobnik. "We're so cool, that's what."What prompts that proud observation?"Well, just listen to what people are talking about."
FEATURES
By Mike Royko and Mike Royko,Tribune Media Services | October 5, 1990
IF YOU ASK ME," said Slats Grobnik, "that woman sportswriter got what she deserved when the guy waved his whatsis at her in the locker room."I didn't ask you."Then ask me and I'll tell you."You already did."Oh. Yeah, I guess I did. What I mean is, she brought the whole thing on herself. If she hadn't been there, it wouldn't have happened, would it?"If we weren't sitting here having a beer, we wouldn't be sitting here having a beer, would we?"I don't understand what that means."I don't either.
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