Duct Tape

Duct tape accessories are the new black. Well, maybe that's going too far. But duct tape handbags and wallets are definitely the new silver. In the hands of David Pippenger and friends, the do-it-all tape has crashed the fashion world like LeRoy Neiman at the Louvre museum. The accessories -- two wallets, a purse and a palm-sized cash-and-ID holder called "Barhopper" -- made their debut last August at the Fashion Avenue Merchandise Expo in New York and the MAGIC fashion show in Las Vegas.

Three Wilde Lake High School seniors are attempting to resurrect the student-run Wilde Times Cafe that closed last summer after it lost its lease. The students have a start on funding and a name - Duct Tape - for the replacement to the cafe, which opened in Wilde Lake Village Center in 1999. But they lack one crucial component: a space. Jamie Daniller, a senior at Wilde Lake, said she, Christina Baker and Mary Reeves have been searching for a vacant space but have not been successful.

It wasn't so long ago that Banana Republic was the Temple of Khaki. We're talking Jeep rammed through the front window of the store and a catalog filled with references to Africa and the jungle and brimming with khaki pants, vests and ghurka shorts. The store is now better known for its tres fashionable work and casual clothes, but Banana Republic hasn't forgotten its khaki roots -- that much is evident from its spring collection. Now, however, the store is calling the stuff "chino" and making it look more contemporary and less weekendy.

IF AUSTRALIA, one of the few countries backing U.S. military action against Iraq, decides not to send its elite swimmers to Indianapolis on April 6 for a United States vs. Aussies duel in the pool, people would understand. There's the question now about being a terrorist target. There's also the inclination to rethink priorities. Yesterday, Australian swim officials said they would decide later this week whether to allow their athletes to make the trip, thus putting into question a rare opportunity for Australia's Ian Thorpe and North Baltimore Aquatic Club's Michael Phelps to circle each other in a supercharged atmosphere before the world championships this July in Barcelona, Spain.

Unlike just about everything else on the Fox network, the real-time thriller 24 has never claimed to be reality TV. But lately, some of the elements have rung pretty true: a terrorist threat to America, a president dealing with an impending war. But the series' gripping sense of reality was pretty much exploded this past week, when we watched counterterrorism agent Jack Bauer (Kiefer Sutherland) simply duck and cover behind a big rock to protect himself from a massive nuclear weapon blast mere miles away.

THE ADVERTISEMENT was nestled on the back page of this newspaper's Maryland section the other day, alongside gift certificates for The Prime Rib Restaurant and openings at elegant Harborview condominiums: a photograph of a gas mask, and the headline "Protect Your Family From Bio-terrorism." As America seems to edge its way toward war in the Persian Gulf, the positioning seemed a reflection of national ambivalence. We're not certain if our war anxieties should get in the way of a really great meal, followed by a blissful night's rest by the Inner Harbor.

Now we know why we bought all that duct tape. Not for Code Orange, that's so yesterday. Not for Code Yellow, our current national alert level, either. It's for Code White. The snowstorms of '03 call for heavy-duty arts and crafts projects and home improvements that can only be accomplished with thick rolls of lovely silver duct tape. Here are a few suggestions. * Duct-tape your kids together and see how long it takes them to pull themselves apart. (Could be considered both arts and crafts and home improvement.

ANCHORAGE, Alaska - Way up here, while Tom Ridge was sending a ripple of code orange panic through the Lower 48 and urging everyone to stock up on duct tape in case of a terrorist attack, people on the last frontier were having a good chuckle. Anchorage had just held its annual Duct Tape Ball. Performers at the city's Fly By Night Club have been playing rolls of duct tape as musical instruments for 16 years. Pilots use the stuff to repair airplane wings. Dog mushers stick it on their faces to prevent frostbite.

WASHINGTON - Pssst! Anybody want some duct tape? How about 200 yards of plastic sheeting? Yes, my fellow Americans. Someone at the Page household has, as in many other American households, panicked. Our panic began when federal officials upgraded the nation's terrorist alert status to "Code Orange." "What are we supposed to do?" asked the lovely and talented Mrs. Page. Wake me when we reach "Code Indigo," I said. Since this administration is too obsessed with secrecy to tell us why they're ratcheting the "alert" status up or down, the government's "alerts" basically remind us of what we Americans already know: Watch out, somebody might be trying to kill you. Not surprisingly, a lot of people complain that the administration hasn't been more specific about how we should respond to alerts.

We journalists are journalists 24-7, if you know what I mean. We are always on the alert, hooked into world events as if they were our power source and ready to report at a moment's notice. Journalists never take the day off. Late last week, my editors asked that we all keep our "journalistic hats on wherever we are" and report the community's response to heightened terror alerts. Like the old firehouse dog that I am, I felt my blood pump faster, and I asked: "What?" Seems that while I had been working the basketball concession stand and arguing with my teen-ager about her curfew and loading the dishwasher one more time, the Bush administration had increased the terror alert to, I don't know, hot pink, or something, and I had missed it. All I'd heard was something about a possible snowstorm.