'Real Housewives of Orange County' recap, 'The Cold War'

  • Gretchen rocks the vintage snowsuit before hitting the slopes in Canada.
Gretchen rocks the vintage snowsuit before hitting the slopes…
July 09, 2013|By Steven Eliopoulos

O Canada! This week's episode starts with Lydia wanting to share her Canadian roots with her group of friends by planning a ski trip in Whistler.

Lydia feels that Americans don't know anything outside of this country and is excited to experience something fun and new with the group. Because Lydia planned the trip, she knows there will be no strippers or no giant penises to ruin this trip for her.

The girls pack the few winter clothes they own as they prepare to leave warm, sunny Orange County and prepare to head off to blustery Canada. Alexis brings a blinged-out Bible for Lydia as ammunition on the trip to protect herself from the girls.

Tamra informs Heather that Gretchen and Lauri are spreading rumors on Vicki and the alleged threesome scandal. Heather doesn't want to get involved and both ladies think that Vicki would never do something like that. The guilt becomes a burden on Tamra and she feels that she is being a bad friend to Vicki if she doesn't tell her what is going on.

The women arrive safely in Canada and immediately get escorted to their hotel in Whistler as they attempt to sing O Canada and pop champagne.

Heather announces that she isn't staying long and has to fly back to L.A. for her latest role on a new sitcom. She calls Gretchen out for lying about getting a role on the same show claiming that she was never offered a spot. Alexis claims that she too was contacted about playing a part on the sitcom. Apparently this is the show to be on!

Lydia's Uncle Greg visits and the girls try to hook him up with a newly single Vicki. Lydia already has enough crazy in her family and has no desire to have Vicki as an aunt. Heather leaves several hours later as the girls head to bed to rest up for an early morning of skiing.

The group woke up at the crack of dawn all dolled up with full make up and gear up in their ski equipment. On the ski lift, Lauri and Gretchen talk more about Vicki in front of a clueless, naïve Alexis.

Laura, Lydia and Gretchen are pros on the slopes, while some of the other girls aren't having as much fun.

"My t--s are going to fall off from frostbite," said a chilly Tamra. Vicki and Tamra are bored with the bunny slope and are ready to tackle the big hill. When Tamra finally gets Vicki alone she mentions the personal sexual rumors spread by Lauri.

Vicki becomes livid with Lauri and also Gretchen for being the messenger of these untruths. Vicki confronts Gretchen to get her side of the story which causes an uncomfortable tension with the trio. "This is truly a cluster f--- of friends," Tamra said.

In what appears to be a game of "telephone" gone horribly awry, the accusations against Vicki buildup causing an explosion of emotions when Lauri and Vicki try to talk. This is what happens when these women talk behind someone's back and don’t know what they are talking about.

Lauri keeps blabbing out more and more private information about Vicki. Whether what she is saying is true or not, Lauri is completely classless and shows absolutely no tact. Alexis and Lydia need to bring out their crystal-studded Bibles and smack these women across the face with it because they need some Jesus in their lives. Lauri can dish out the dirt but gets defensive when Vicki gives it right back to her.

Even though Vicki goes crazy and yells and screams nonsense at the top of her lungs, she always remains true to her character and will stand up for herself all day every day.

The drama continues in Canada next week.

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