'True Blood' recap: 'Who Are You, Really?'

  • It's time for an Authority Takeover Party!
It's time for an Authority Takeover Party! (HBO )
June 17, 2013|Marisa Siegel | For The Baltimore Sun

"True Blood" is back, and Season 6 picks up right where Season 5 left off. We’re watching bloody Billith rise, but this time from his red-tinged perspective.

I’ll be honest — I’m approaching Season 6 a little nervously. What will a "True Blood" without Alan Ball at the helm look like? But before I get ahead of myself, here’s what you need to know about what went down in Episode 1.

Billith has Risen

We spend the bulk of the episode trying to figure out just what Bill has become. As Eric, Sookie & company speed away from the exploding scene, Sookie and Eric agree that Billith let them go. But a little later, Nora helpfully points out that if there’s any chance that Lilith is walking the earth, they must to destroy her. And Billith does seem pretty evil as he tortuously summons Jess toward wherever he’s hiding out. Sookie jumps in the car to protect Jessica, with Eric and Nora close behind.

Sookie and Jess pull up to an appropriately creepy mansion, where they find an unbloodied Bill in a rocking chair on the porch. He tells the girls he “just wants to talk.” Before he can say anything else, Nora whizzes down from the night sky with cheesy-special-effect speed and Bill swiftly takes her down. He attempts to do the same to Eric, but then SOOKIE comes up from behind and STAKES BILL. Remember when these two were happily married?

After a quick stumble, Billith yanks the stake out. He’s fine, if somewhat surprised about it. “Now can we talk?” he growls.

Sookie: "What are you?"

Nora: "Are you Lilith?"

Bill: "I am Bill Compton. Though clearly, I am something more. I see that now. I see everything so differently now."

Sookie protests that Bill Compton is dead, and that whoever this person is ought to just leave them all alone forever. Unfortunately for Sookie, Jess disagrees. She jumps to her maker’s defense and insists that he’s staying, she’s staying and everyone else can just get out.

Alone, Jess and Bill share a sweet moment as Bill brings a tired Jess some warmed-up True Blood and tucks her into bed. It’s very cozy until Jess spills the mug, and Bill suspends the liquid in the air (without even trying!). He tells Jess that he needs her now more than ever, because he has powers even he cannot fathom and power turns men mad. He needs her to keep him honest. After all, “Surviving a staking is some heady f---ing shit.”

Bill seems very much like the Bill Compton we’ve known all along as he walks out of Jess’s room, until he starts hearing a woman’s voice whisper his name. He follows the sound into his office, where he finds multiple Liliths waiting to rush into his body.

Guess he’s not himself after all. Time for Bill to get in touch with his feminine side(s)!

So has Alcide:

Bill isn’t the only one gaining power. Alcide makes his status as packmaster official by chowing down on the remains of his challenger. The pack begins a raucous celebration of Alcide, including a proposition from a nude werelady named Danielle. Alcide and Danielle run off into the woods for a quick makeout session, until Rikki finds them. Alcide is sheepishly apologetic, but Rikki turns the tables and initiates a werewolf threesome. Afterward, she reminds Alcide that she’s his “number one b-----“ forever.

Faerie Babies Grow Up So Quick

Finding himself saddled with a litter of newborn faeries, Andy is seriously stressed out. And he hasn’t even had time to “take a goddamn poop class!” Arlene and Terry pitch in and lend a hand, teaching Andy how to change a diaper and reassuring him that all good parents are scared out of their wits about parenthood.

Andy seems to be calm, even content. He catches a quick nap on the couch...and is woken up by his rapidly-aged daughter. She’s grown at least three years in less than a day. Andy is understandably freaked out by this new development (pun intended).

Rights for (Tax-Paying) Humans!

Governor Burrell presides over a Human Rights rally, complete with signs reading slogans like, “Gooey Vamps are Good Vamps.” The governor acknowledges the recent vampire murders due to the shortage of True Blood, and institutes a statewide vampire curfew. He’ll also be closing down all vampire businesses. Embracing the Southern hillbilly stereotype, he urges his citizens to get guns and defend the ones they love. He just wants to protect human, “tax-paying” members of society!

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