What to do when the wedding-planning meltdown begins

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November 15, 2012|By Rachel Gatulis, For The Baltimore Sun

Inevitably, a bride-to-be has a meltdown or two and experiences a roller coaster of emotions during the whole planning process. My freak-out occurred a few weeks ago regarding the size of our wedding and the money we are spending on this celebration. The numbers add up.

As a whole, it seems really frivolous but when you break it down to see if there is anywhere you can save, you find that you have already done so where you can.

One night, I managed to sob, "Andrew...can...;we...just...elope?" I was a hot mess. Andrew talked me off the bridal ledge, and we reluctantly cut our guest list. A 220-person guest list just seemed scary.

Why am I telling you this? One reason is to let you know that you are not alone. I am lucky to have a supportive fiance who actually enjoys taking part in the planning and has some really great ideas. I also have an incredible team of bridesmaids. I hope you do, too.

The other reason is to impart some words of wisdom from a friend of mine who was a bridesmaid over the summer. When her bride-to-be was stressing and having one of those "It is so close to the wedding, nothing is ready, nothing is perfect, there is so much left to plan" meltdowns (which I'm crossing my fingers I don't have), here is what she said (I'm paraphrasing here, so bear with me): People go to school and get degrees to become a wedding planner. It is their full-time job to create and orchestrate these important celebrations. You (bride) did not go to school for this. You had no training. You do, however, have a full-time job and a full social calendar and on top of this, you are trying to plan a wedding -- yet another full time job in which you have no experience.

Well said, friend. I forget how she ended her words of encouragement but I'm sure it was something like, despite all of this, you are doing an amazing job and this wedding will be the most perfect day of your life, thanks to you. She is 100 percent right, and wise beyond her years. Wedding planning involves meetings, spreadsheets, planning, budgeting, presentations, interviews ... sounds like a job to me.

So, when you feel that meltdown coming on, remember you are working two jobs, so have a good cry, take a deep breath, enjoy a glass of wine and keep on trucking because in the end, it will all be worth it.

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