'The Amazing Race' recap, Thieves in Istanbul (not Constantinople)

  • Trey and Lexi split the stolen $100 with the Twins. Will it come back to bite them?
Trey and Lexi split the stolen $100 with the Twins. Will it come… (CBS )
November 05, 2012|By Janell Sutherland

Last week, the teams stayed in Bangladesh and got very hot. The Twins somehow failed to fall for Boyfriend Ryan's nerdy charm, and the Goat Farmers came in last but were spared from elimination by a benevolent Phil and a pretty woman at the Pit Stop.

The next destination is Istanbul (not Constantinople). Did you know that Istanbul (not Constantinople) is the only metropolis in the world that stands on two continents? Europe and Asia. How cool is that?

Any final thoughts about Bangladesh, teams? Boyfriend Ryan says they've learned a lot, and he tells people that if their 52-inch tv goes fuzzy, "don’t b---- about it, go to Dhaka." Try to work that phrase into a sentence this week, I'll give you extra credit.

Now there's only one flight headed for Istanbul (not Constantinople) so you know all the teams will be on it. This gives us some time for a chat.

Why the hate?

The Twins think Abbie and Boyfriend Ryan are "weirdos." I still don't get it.

Boyfriend Ryan says Team Rock On and the Twins are the two most annoying teams, their hair is all the same length (heh) and he's tired of them all.  Then when Monster Truck joins the crowd, and Abbie wonders if everyone is scheming against them, he says, "You put those six heads together and you get about three brain cells." Oh, rude, Boyfriend Ryan! But still funny.

Karmic retribution, party of four

At the travel agency, Rock On loses $100. It's a wad of American money sitting on a table near a computer. Twin One finds it and calls out, not too loudly, "Whose money?"

Twin Two immediately shushes her and pulls her off to the side where Trey and Lexi are. Lexi hears them talk about the money and they joke about sharing it. The Twins interview that Lexi was on board with the plan but that Trey needed some convincing, so they didn't give him a vote. The Twins hold on to the money.

Later, at the airport, the Twins feel guilty so they do split the money with Texi. They explain that it will also split the guilt, "and they're Christians so they'll pray for us." 

So, there's lying during the Race, there's misleading, but stealing money is a new level of evil. I'm waiting for the moment when we can all point and say "Aha! That's for stealing the money!"

This makes everything about Bangladesh okay

Meanwhile, James and Abba are missing $100. Abba thinks he left a zipper open on the backpack and it fell out in a cab, they don't even consider the idea of someone taking it. I'm not sure if they need that money for plane tickets, but they say they can't move on in the Race without the money.

Although they hate to beg in a city where they're surrounded by poverty, they do it anyway. They go to a business district and talk to some very generous locals. One woman gives them a hug, another man says, "It's my country, you're my guest." That's the sweetest thing. Their cab driver says, "Bangladesh good, not bad." James and Abba agree -- they've been given $100.

From Phil's Twitter feed: "Kudos to the generous people of Bangladesh for helping out the rockers. They must be Megadeth fans :)"

Cab vs. metro: How about both?

Okay, everyone flies to Istanbul (not Constantinople). Everyone jumps in a cab except for the Chippendales and Monster Truck. This is because cabs are faster, unless the traffic is bad. 

On the subway, the Chipps hear from a local that it's too early in the morning for bad traffic, so the cabs are definitely faster. They decide to get off the train and hop into a cab.

Monster Truck sees this move, worries, discusses, and then calls the Chipps followers. Rob claims that they'll win the leg. Let's see how this works out.

Best tradition of the Ottoman Empire

Teams get the Detour clue in a marketplace from a candy vendor. He hands them their clue along with a box of Turkish Delight (on a moonlit night).

The Detour, Phil tells us, involves two ancient traditions that date back to the Ottoman empire. One choice is to transport Turkish bagels known as simits on a tray balanced on your head and deliver them on foot to three separate restaurants. The other choice is to have a Turkish bath.

Now I can recall some misleading clues, like sit in an ice cave in your underwear for 10 minutes, or get the world's most painful foot massage. Even Boyfriend Ryan understands this: "It'll probably be painful but let's do it."

The Turkish bath is painful for some. Rock On James, describing the intensity of the massage, says,

"He pulled my heart out, showed it to me while it was beating, said 'Here, it's going too slow, here you go."

Boyfriend Ryan gets his foot scrubbed and says, "Look at that. Abbie won't do that for me. I need to get your number, dude."

At one point four teams -- Rock On, Twins, Texi, and Dominate -- are sprawled out on a large slab getting rubbed down. It looks awesome. They all leave at roughly the same time.

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