Top 10 ways General Electric can improve its image

March 29, 2011|By Luke Broadwater

By now, you've probably heard about how General Electric didn't pay taxes on more than $20 million in profits over the past two years. GE has received a lot of criticism over this little indiscretion. 

But fear not, our rich friends. We're here to help. 

We present to you, free of charge of course  ... 

The top 10 ways General Electric can improve its image 

10. Use the money it didn't pay in taxes to save Madonna's school 

9. Use the money it didn't pay in taxes to make the "Jersey Shore" stop

8. Free a reporter from Joe Biden's closet 

7. Use the money it didn't pay in taxes for a personalized advertising campaign at the homes of the New Black Panthers reminding them daily of their irrelevancy  

6. Use the money it didn't pay in taxes to make Donald Trump stop 

5. Join New York Mayor Bloomburg in a Spiderman extravaganza 

4. Use the money it didn't pay in taxes to author a book of more convincing excuses for Newt Gingrich

3. Use the money it didn't pay it taxes to buy Bill Maher some class 

2. Use the money it didn't pay it taxes to buy CBS better ratings 

1. Start paying some damn taxes 

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