OK, Baltimore, let's see what success does to you and your football team when it plays the Cleveland Browns today.
I say this because, as you may know, the Ravens are suddenly getting a ton of national respect.
ESPN.com's "panel of experts" lists them at No. 1 in the weekly power rankings. They're also No. 1 in SI.com's power rankings.
And everyone from current NFL coaches to ex-jocks in the TV booth to print and Web pundits is weighing in on what a great team the Ravens are.
I know, I know . . . I'm just as sick about this as you are.
Because let's face it: This is not a town that does respect well.
No, this is a town that does disrespect a whole lot better.
This is a town with a chip on its shoulder the size of a sequoia, a town that revels in being slighted and overlooked by the rest of the country.
"Why is everyone out to get us?" - that's been Baltimore's motto for years.
But now the city has a football team off to an impressive 2-0 start - soon to be 3-0, unless the Browns manage to put knockout drops in the Ravens' Gatorade - and people are saying nice things about it.
Naturally, fans around here don't know how to take that.
Neither do the Ravens, to tell you the truth.
Did you get a load of John Harbaugh at the news conference the other day when asked to comment on ex-NFL coach Steve Mariucci picking the Ravens as the team to beat in the AFC?
Harbaugh looked like he had just been told his car was hit in the parking lot.
"We don't care," he said finally. "We don't particularly want that. That's not a place we're comfortable with."
(Pause.)
"I'm going to tell you what: There are a lot of great teams in this conference."
Us? The best team in the conference? Oh, no. You must be mistaken!
But the oddsmakers must think the Ravens are a pretty fair team, having installed them as 13 1/2 -point favorites to beat the Browns.
Of course, you can't get the Ravens to admit they pay any attention to power rankings.
Which is as it should be.
No. 1, we're only two games into the season. No. 2, this isn't college football, where power rankings actually matter for bowl games and that abomination known as the BCS.
No. 3, any egghead on any Web site that covers the NFL can throw a bunch of numbers together and call them power rankings.
The other thing you can't get the Ravens to admit is that this game against the Browns should be a walk-over.
This just in: The Ravens play 'em one at a time.
We heard this all week from every coach and player at the Castle.
Every game's important, we never look past the next game, you throw out the records when it comes to divisional opponents and blah, blah, blah.
Therefore, in the time-honored tradition of heavily favored teams everywhere, the Ravens spent the week making the Browns seem like a reincarnation of the '04 Patriots or '95 Cowboys or '85 Bears, or any other powerhouse you can name.
"As far as we're concerned, we're going into the game 0-0," said middle linebacker Ray Lewis. " 'Cause it's a divisional game. We know they're pretty formidable."
Formidable?
Um, Ray? These are the Cleveland Browns we're talking about.
Jimmy Brown doesn't play for them anymore. Brady Quinn, he of the 66.9 passer rating, fourth-worst in the league, is the starting quarterback.
The offense has been awful. The defense falls apart in the second half. And new coach Eric Mangini has been about as popular as swine flu with his players, instituting all these petty rules about parking and water bottles that are reportedly driving the Browns nuts.
"Eric Mangini can take the fun out of a 10-year-old's birthday party with Big Bird there," CBS analyst Boomer Esiason said.
Ouch. But that might be the quote of the young season.
Nevertheless, the Ravens stuck all week to the party line about how tough the Cleveland game would be.
By the time you finished listening to outside linebacker-defensive end Terrell Suggs talk up the Browns, you wondered whether the Ravens should even show up for this one.
"They're definitely going to bring their A-game," T-Sizzle said of the Browns, "and were definitely going to bring ours. ... They'll come to play. They'll come to win. We expect nothing less."
Well, OK, Sizzle.
But that's not bringing your A-quotes.
We'll see what happens today when the whistle blows.
Listen to Kevin Cowherd on Tuesdays from 4 p.m. to 6 p.m. with Jerry Coleman on Fox 1370 AM Sports.
