All kinds of possibilities for Senator

April 07, 2009|By DAN RODRICKS

Nobody asked me, but ...

That's a smart recommendation for the Senator Theatre - have the city foreclose, pay off the debt, then find new management to run it as both a first-run cinema and entertainment complex. The ownership of the Charles Theatre could rotate films through the place. A small theater could be added. They could have "college porn night" now and then. There are all kinds of possibilities.

This will make a great pitch - a real convincer - for the University of Maryland admissions office as it sets out to recruit leading students from all over the world: Come to College Park, we show hard-core porn here!

The Orioles' potential for failure has been greatly exaggerated. Something magic is going to happen. This isn't based on serious analysis. It's just a feeling, based on Nick Markakis having hair this year.

The Orioles have new starting pitchers. The only one I'm going to miss is Daniel Cabrera - and what I'll miss most is listening to Jim Palmer describe his many flaws during telecasts.

Even lifelong Baltimoreans suffer from Harford Road-Belair Road Confusion. HRBRC is a common malady. You believe something - a store, bakery, barroom, driving academy - is on one, and it turns out to be on the other. It happens a lot. It happens to the best of us. It's a Baltimore thing.

Dolly Parton on 60 Minutes the other night looked like Liberace meets Joan Rivers.

And it appeared that John Waters lent Dolly his mustache for the interview with Morley Safer.

And that was nice of John.

Nobody asked me but ...

I think it's great that spring is finally here - sorta. But I'm not ready to start mowing the lawn; I just took down the Christmas lights.

I have discovered a great snack - Manischewitz "EVERYTHING!" matzo, with poppy seeds, kosher salt, garlic and onion.

Rep. Elijah Cummings' exchange with former AIG chief Hank Greenberg is one for the ages - or, at least, the next Michael Moore film. Cummings: "Do you accept any responsibility at all for the events leading up to [the largest U.S. corporate failure in history]?" Greenberg: "No, I don't. Nothing to do with me whatever." Arrogance is bliss.

Nobody asked me but ...

The best use of Twitter is as a personalized headline service. If you "follow" anything on it, you should follow news sources - The Baltimore Sun, The New York Times, NPR, Al-Jazeera English, etc.

I think it's a commentary on how numb we've become to mass killings with guns when my newspaper plays the death of three police officers in Pittsburgh on Page 12 and The New York Times puts its report on Page 15.

If Michael Steele lasts out the year as Republican Party chairman, I'll buy him lunch on Jan. 2, 2010, at Tio Pepe's.

Now that the University of Maryland, Baltimore County chess team has won its fifth national championship in nine years, coach Alan Sherman should conduct seminars on his recruitment methods. And Gary Williams should sign up.

Nobody asked me, but ...

"Bat-killing fungus" sounds goofy, but it's not a source of amusement. A lot of people are horrified by bats and probably wish them good riddance. Not me. I once had 125 of them in my attic and, while they didn't become pets, I learned the benefits of bats while a pleasant bat guy from Fells Point plucked them off the chimney and released them outdoors. Bats are a benefit to anyone who detests mosquito bites. The average Eastern bat, such as those threatened in Maryland because of the spreading bat-killing fungus, can eat hundreds of mosquitoes on a summer night. Estimates I've seen - how would you like to have been the grad student who counted them? - range from 1,000 to 3,000 'skeeter-sized bugs. And they don't charge for the service.

Nobody asked me but ...

The best ticket to anything around here this week would take the holder to the NCAA Frozen Four at the Verizon Center in our nation's capital - the men's national collegiate ice hockey championship. People love the pro game, of course. But, for my money, give me the college game. And the story of the week: Bemidji State has made the semifinals for the first time, along with Miami of Ohio. (Both were the No. 4 seeds in their four-team regional playoffs. As Bill Murray put it in Caddyshack: "What an incredible Cinderella story.") The other two teams are from Boston University and the University of Vermont. But I'll be rooting for Bemidji and have been doing so ever since seeing them lose a hard-fought NCAA regional a couple of years ago. Go Beavers! Put Bemidji on the map. (I mean, outside of Minnesota.)

Nobody asked me but ...

Scrabble is not an easy game to pick up after being away from it for several years. I'm learning that this spring, as I play for the first time in a long time and the first time online. My opponent is an impressive, experienced and confident adversary named Sally Thorner. Losing badly the other day and concerned about the score, I asked my opponent, "When is this game over?" She replied, "Before it began?" Ouch.

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