But the war between the sexes in black pop has been even nastier over the years, going back to the keloid-scarred 'hood-rat classics of Mary J. Blige and Bell Biv Devoe in the early '90s. Just a year and a half ago, Beyonce, belting yet another Ne-Yo-penned hit, rocketed to No. 1 as she searingly told her guy "don't you ever get to thinking you're irreplaceable."
The men and women of today's mainstream R&B rarely show a sweet and vulnerable side. It's an unfortunate influence of hip-hop. The only melodic R&B hit to bravely do so recently came from a sapphire-eyed white guy, Robin Thicke. "Lost Without You," his lilting 2006 ballad that topped the R&B charts for 11 weeks, was a celebration of his love for his black wife, actress Paula Patten.
"I loved that song because it showed a positive side you just don't hear in black love songs anymore," says Natasha Eubanks, founder of The YBF.com, a popular black entertainment Web site based in Alexandria, Va. "When Robin put that song out there, he wasn't afraid to say, 'I need you.' Why are black men and black women afraid to say that? We just need that example of a real couple in love and working it out. That's what you see in Barack and Michelle."
Cliff and Clair Huxtable, the characters played by Bill Cosby and Phylicia Rashad on the beloved '80s sitcom The Cosby Show, are mainstream culture's closest approximation of the kind of couple the Obamas represent. But urban folks coming of age during Reagonomics certainly didn't see too many couples like that in their crumbling neighborhoods or on other TV stations for that matter. Besides, the only music celebrated in the fictional Huxtable household was in the form of dusty classics by Ray Charles and long-gone jazz legends such as Charlie Parker.
But the musical tastes of the nation's first black president appear to be a little earthier. Obama has admitted to having Kanye West and Jay-Z on his iPod. During his nearly two-year campaign, he was seen "palling around" with such neo-soul singers as John Legend. But some artists hope that his open affection and respect for his wife will inspire acts to write differently about black relationships.
"Barack and Michelle are physical examples of the romantic songs I sing about," says Maysa, the Baltimore-based urban soul singer whose new album, Metamorphosis, topped Billboard's contemporary jazz charts two weeks ago. The CD features "I Need a Man," a song partly inspired by Obama. "What I hope Barack will show black men is that it's cool to love your wife and honor her and take care of the kids. I think a lot of songwriters will see what they have and want to write songs about that. They definitely inspire me."
