Stadler has long been one of the game's best characters. His wood covers - giant plush walrus heads - reveal why. Listed at 5 feet 10, 240 pounds, Stadler still has the Walrus facial hair framing his mouth like a pair of tusks, though perhaps not as prominent as when he won the Masters in 1982. This week, the Walrus was walking in pain and eventually withdrew from the tournament before the second round.
On Day One, his 115-yard approach shot on No. 5 landed well short of the green, buried in a bunker. "Geezus!" Stadler yelled, slamming his iron onto his bag. We cautiously followed a few feet behind, wearing our safari hats. "Watch it," warned Joe Klein, a tournament volunteer, in a whisper. "Don't get too close. He's already mad."
The grunts and grimaces on the course were entertaining, but it was the small moments far removed from the competition that struck me most. Like when Bryant grabbed a bottle of water from a cooler and delivered it to his wife in the middle of the round.
Or at the turn, when the Velenovskys and I were loading up in the snack tent. Nelson, who has three major victories and a spot in the World Golf Hall of Fame on his resume, finished his tee shot and joined us. When I looked up, I noticed the golfer was massaging the shoulders of his caddie. "There you go," Nelson, 61, said calmly. Could you picture any PGA player doing this? Turns out, his caddie is 30-year-old Josh Nelson. Last year, the pair won the tour's father-son tournament.
On one hole, Bryant was sitting on a cooler, as the others reloaded on bottled water. "There's soda in here, I think," Bryant said. "There was no Diet Coke yesterday, so I reprimanded them and they got it on every hole today." He laughed, sipping from his third soda of the round.
His wife revealed that he often goes through six Diet Cokes in a round. This might explain the frequent potty breaks. Once sheltered safely inside one of the course's portable restrooms, any trained wildlife observer would notice the ad on the wall.
"Come here often?" reads the sign, an ad for enlarged prostate medication. "Your going problem could be your growing problem."
The entire day provided a unique view, to say the least, the golfus nontigris professionalium as never seen before.
SENIOR PLAYERS
Today and tomorrow, Baltimore Country Club, Timonium
Information: ceseniorplayers.com
