The sequence of Zohan's first showdown with the Palestinian super-terrorist known as the Phantom (John Turturro) parodies both Rambo and Steven Spielberg's self-important Munich. (Zohan has the good sense to postpone any swapping of victim stories between the two sides.) Unfortunately, their rematch and eventual team-up falls flat. The first time someone accuses the commando-turned-hairstylist of homosexuality, it's passably humorous; the fifth or sixth time, it flunks the laugh test. (In a movie like this, the taste test goes out the window, or maybe down the toilet.)
Zohan's use of hummus as everything from a food stuff to a dentifrice and a fire-fighting tool clicks because it's goofy, diverse and off-hand. Elsewhere, Sandler and company take nimble running jokes and run them into the ground.
They milk dry Zohan's relationship with Gail (Lainie Kazan), the zaftig mother of his first New York friend, Michael (Nick Swardson); you can only take so much of Swardson's appalled little-boy look before it settles on your face, too. Sandler's padded briefs prove to be a relentless sight gag, and the scenes of him servicing his aging customers in every way make the The Producers look subtle.
FOR THE RECORD - A review of You Don't Mess With the Zohan in yesterday's Movies Today section misspelled the name of actress Emmanuelle Chriqui.
The Sun regrets the error.
Even the satire of Israeli-run American electronics shops with names like "Going Out of Business" - so resonant with anyone who's bought a knockoff gizmo on the promise "it has Sony guts" - gets a bit monotonous.
Emmanuelle Chikri has little to do except look gorgeous and think nice thoughts as Dalia, the hero's Palestinian boss. (She does that effortlessly.) Still, whenever the movie turns rote and (what's worse) soggy, there's usually a pungent bit to come, such as a Hezbollah customer-service hot line and Rob Schneider's awe-struck look at Mariah Carey singing "The Star-Spangled Banner" at a Hacky-Sack championship. Schneider plays a Palestinian cabbie who just wants to be a goatherd. The film unites Israelis and Palestinians who realize they like the way they live side by side in New York's melting pot, scraping together a living and following individual as well as tribal dreams.
Zohan sings secular-commercial kumbaya, but at least it has a daffy disco beat. As an hour-long HBO special, it could have been a contender.
michael.sragow@baltsun.com
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You Don't Mess With the Zohan
(Columbia Pictures) Starring Adam Sandler, John Turturro, Emmanuelle Chriqui. Directed by Dennis Dugan. Rated PG-13 for crude and sexual content, language and nudity. Time 113 minutes.
