Help the city - and clean up

"Bludgeoned!" headlined a story about a teenager accused of beating his mother to death. "INSANE?" topped an article about the court plea of a man charged with drowning his three children in a bathtub. "HOLY STASH" - less startling, since for once the topic wasn't horrific death - was about drug dealers hiding their wares near a Virgin Mary statue at an East Baltimore Catholic school.

Funny, wicked, tasteless tabloid headlines add something to New York civic life. How will that play in Charm City? I asked City Councilman Bobby Curran, who picks up the New York Post and Daily News five days a week. Though Curran gets a laugh out of the headlines, he's not sure Baltimore will be amused.

"The Baltimore market," Curran said, "is probably more tasteful."

Mr. Smith to dine with his close friends

Well, now we really know Jim Smith is up to something.

The term-limited but still fundraising Baltimore County exec has agreed to be the victim of a roast, to benefit the Marine Trades Association of Baltimore County scholarship fund.

Marc Steiner will emcee the $65-a-head event May 29 at Martin's East. Among those lined up to poke fun: Baltimore County State's Attorney Scott Shellenberger, Howard County Exec Ken Ulman, banker Ed Hale and Court of Appeals Judge Joseph Murphy.

Curiously absent from the list: Comptroller Peter Franchot, the man whose job Smith is rumored to be after.