Best Actress -- Terrell Owens, Dallas Cowboys. Though he was mostly quiet during the season, T.O. came through when it counted, bawling on the podium when asked about Tony Romo and Jessica Simpson. When you think about it, T.O. is like Diane Keaton as Annie Hall, and we're Alvy Singer. He's sexy and fun, but flaky and crazy, and for some reason, we can't seem to move on. We can't let go. Maybe it's because, in the end, we're the neurotic mess. And as Alvy says at the end of the movie, we need the eggs. Only in this case, "eggs" are "touchdown catches" and "drama." Here's hoping Angela Bassett plays him in the movie: Jess and Tony's Excellent Cabo Adventure.
Best Special (Teams) Effects -- Devin Hester, Chicago Bears. The Bears in 2006 and the Bears in 2007 are like the first two installments of The Matrix. The first installment starts out with so much promise and exceeds everyone's expectations, fooling you into thinking that it will only get better from here. The next installment is a poorly executed, bloated farce that plays out like a two-hour car crash. Hester, however, reminds us of Keanu Reeves' character, Neo. He can't carry a team, much as Reeves can't carry a film, but, mercy, is he fun to watch! It's almost as if he bends time and space. It's a shame Rex Grossman makes us want to take the blue pill from Morpheus so we can wake up and pretend the 2007 season never happened.
