The rectangular green-and-white magnets seem to be everywhere in Howard County. Over doorways, on refrigerators, on file cabinets, on desks and, especially, on car bumpers, there they are, staring back politely with their simple message: "Choose Civility."
Few are suggesting that affluent, high-minded Howard County is particularly in need of a visit from Miss Manners - for heaven's sake, Columbia was explicitly built on values such as tolerance and respect for nature. But wealth is by no means a defense against discourtesy and, as the manners mavens point out, everyone could benefit from extra doses of civility at home, at work, at school, on athletic fields and on that notorious enemy of comity - the road.
With this in mind, the public library launched the civility campaign in February with a talk by P.M. Forni, a notably genteel Johns Hopkins professor who wrote the 2002 book Choosing Civility: The Twenty-Five Rules of Considerate Conduct. Since then, the library has distributed 17,500 magnets and purchased almost 2,000 copies of Forni's book.
Dozens of partners have joined the project, including the school district, which printed 30,000 civility-themed bookmarks and has its own slate of civility projects under way. Civility book groups have blossomed, along with a civility Facebook site, Web site and at least one blog.
Now, coming soon to bumpers in another place that's not exactly known as the seat of rudeness: Choose Civility in Montgomery County. Venice, Fla., recently saw the launch of a civility initiative called Because It Matters. In Cleveland Heights, Ohio, it's the Civility Project. In Duluth, Minn., it's Speak Your Peace Civility Project. All have precisely the same goal of pumping up the local courtesy quotient.
An uncivil person might ask: What the %$# cents&* is up with the manners movement? Isn't that ... trivial? Goody-two-shoes-ish? Uptight? Redundant fluff?
Absolutely not, the propriety pushers will respond - gently and respectfully, of course. Civility and the civility programs cropping up in Maryland and around the country are about something far more profound than thank you and please.
Civility, they say, reduces the literal and figurative costs of stress and leads to greater productivity, better health and more happiness. And all it takes is following some Golden Rule-type steps, such as the ones Forni lays out in his book: Listen, think the best, speak kindly, refrain from idle complaints, apologize earnestly.
