December 25, 2006






You slept

Sootily crept

A guy with a sack

Who's got the knack

Of knowing who's naughty

Who's pure and who's haughty.

Except - It no longer matters,

For both the formers and the latters

Santa's gotta be nonjudgmental:

Gifts for all! Character's incidental!

For the raucous and the gentle,

For the upright and the bentle.

For the lima and the lentil.

So in that spirit (or something quite near it)

Here's a holiday nod to both even and odd:

To Martin O'Malley, governor-elect,

And Robert L. Ehrlich, let's not neglect.

To Benjamin Cardin, of the Capitol shift,

And Michael S. Steele, who may need a lift.

To President Bush, decider-in-chief,

And Senator Clinton, and - oh, Good Grief!

Enough already, with all of this balance,

This even-steven taxes our talents.

So away with all care: May the Cheer be Flowin'

For Stephen Colbert and Sacha Baron Cohen,

For Charlene Cooper Boston, up on North Ave., And the Dixie Chicks, whatever they have;

For one-time ambassador Jim Rosapepe (Bucharest to Annapolis - man, what a step!),

For Sheila Dixon, herronor to be,

And Nancy Kopp, her hands on the key;

For the man with the partners, Ted Venetoulis

We're watching and waiting but totally clueless);

For new defense sec., Robert M. Gates,

Peace on Earth - the whole nation waits;

For gallant Barbaro, knitting and mending,

And Mary Cheney, whose baby is pending;

For Everyman's everyman, Vincent Lancisi,

And add Katie Couric, now somber now breezy;

For Senator Webb, of Old Virginny,

And John Negroponte, who's in on the skinny;

For Harry Reid and Eliot Spitzer,

And Nancy Pelosi, in a new role that fits her;

(You thought we'd find something to rhyme with Pelosi?

A doggerel dance with a do and a do-si?

A fear that she might be a bit status-quosy?

That's not, for the season, quite apropos-y.)

For Peter Franchot and Anthony Brown,

And, yes, Walter Sondheim, that man about town;

For Sarbanes, John, on his very first try,

And Thurgood Marshall, BWI;

For Arundel executive John Leopold,

And even Mark Foley, if we may be so bold;

For Harry Hughes, dispensing advice,

And Britney and K-Fed, undoing the splice;

For Alberto Gonzales, the chief legal guy,

(A Bill of Rights brush-up might help, by-the-by)

And blue-ribbon co-chair James A. Baker,

Something of a mover and definitely a shaker;

For William Donald Schaefer, retired (for now)

And Douglas M. Gansler, ambitious (and how!);

For the laureate of Goddard, John C. Mather,

And the fans of the Ravens, at work on a lather.

Now yes - ho, ho, and all that - we'll stretch out a tad.

Pour us some coffee. You know, this stollen ain't bad.

Christmas has come and the goose has gotten fat,

It's a little over 60 days till Miggy gets to bat.

If Miggy can't get on, then Gibbons'll have to do;

If Gibbons can't get on, then God bless - achoo!

Wrong season, as Ecclesiastes might point out.

Winter's all around us, or somewhere hereabout.

So pile on the firewood, and strike another matchit;

Soak yourself in the spirit of Mr. T. Timothy Cratchit.

Here's a holiday hullabaloo to those across the seas,

Like Premier Shinzo Abe, who leads the Japanese;

And Nouri al-Maliki, the Green Zone potentate,

And huffin' Hugo Chavez, who'd sooner talk than cogitate.

The sooty guy

Bids goodbye,

Keeping score,

No less no more.

A lighter load,

Gifts bestowed,

A parting call:

Merry Xmas all!

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