10 reasons to muzzle Justin

Pop Culture

December 07, 2003|By KNIGHT RIDDER/TRIBUNE

He can sing. He can dance. He can do color commentary for the NBA, shill for McDonald's and suck face with Cameron Diaz at the same time.

He's Justin Timberlake. And he's unbearably annoying.

At 22, Timberlake is the most sought-after American music act of the moment. We're not sure why, but we do know that it's really hard to take seriously a former Mouseketeer turned curly-haired homey.

Rumor, in the form of In Touch magazine, has it that Timberlake is threatening to auction off love letters from ex-girlfriend Britney Spears and donate the profits to charity. The dog!

But there are at least nine other reasons we'd like to muzzle Justin "Justified" Timberlake:

9. His (apparently well-earned) nickname: Trousersnake.

8. His self-consciously "street" Web site sells teeny-weeny "booty shorts" - presumably to 12-year-old girls.

7. He's a nerd. Come on, women. Are we so desperate for sex symbols that Timberlake can end up on the cover of Details magazine - twice? In a Clearasil ad would be more like it.

6. He's a wannabe. Michael Jackson might be weird, but he did it a whole lot better 20 years ago.

5. Trendy, trendy, trendy: Timberlake's now part-owner of a new restaurant in West Hollywood. McDonald's is looking better every day.

4. He made Britney cry - on national television.

3. His own holiday-time TV special, which aired on NBC. We never thought we'd say this, but ... bring back Perry Como!

2. He's dating 31-year-old Diaz, who we understand used to baby-sit him (joke!). Hollywood never ceases to amaze.

1. Spawn of the boy band. Need we say more?

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