Susan's Sweet 16

Basketball: As you fellas sit around hooting and hollering over the NCAA tournament, let this female perspective lead you to a higher bracket.

March 21, 2001|By Susan Reimer

March Madness is a kind of marathon Super Bowl Sunday: The previously uninterested use the NCAA basketball tournament as an excuse for a television-watching, beer-drinking, cheese-snack-eating orgy of excess.

For three weeks each year, nothing gets done in the United States because the men are watching basketball. No deadlines are met. No lawns de-thatched. No homework done. Not even light bulbs get changed. Men of every age work the remote control, trying to get the Cincinnati-Kent State score just so they can see if they've chosen correctly on those ubiquitous bracket sheets.

Not that these choices make much difference. Guys could make more money at a lemonade stand than gambling in the office pool. The only thing less likely than their guessing which of 64 teams will make it to the Final Four is, well, their trying to discern why the woman in their life is sulking.

With that in mind (and inspired by a current ad for Sony big-screen TVs), we reach out to the hoopster-hopeless in the household. Want to understand this exercise in futility? Try looking at the "Sweet Sixteen" this way, full of choices women are certain to understand.

What do women want? We say, "Bracket this, boys!"

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