Grab remote, stock up on snacks, then cringe

Couch Potato

January 24, 2001|By Kevin Cowherd | Kevin Cowherd,SUN STAFF

Fortified by a trash-barrel-size tin of Pringles and ice-cold Yuengling, the Couch Potato grabbed the remote last night and settled back to watch the first waves of pre-Super Bowl Ravens coverage from Tampa, Fla.

All the local stations sent their own people to yesterday's media day circus at Raymond James Stadium, where, we were told, Ray Lewis was receiving the kind of grilling not seen since the Clarence Thomas hearings.

Well, maybe so. But the first thing CP saw on Channel 13's 5 o'clock news was a little boy holding a microphone - he was said to be doing "interviews" for Nickelodeon - asking a Raven: "I want to know if I can challenge you to a staring contest?"

This was followed by anchor Denise Koch asking CBS analyst Randy Cross what question she should ask the players.

Cross' thoughtful answer: "Ask them: Do you wear your pants that tight to show off your butt?"

Hoo, boy. Quickly, the Couch Potato's fat little thumb stabbed the remote and we were off on a wild ride into the bizarro world of dopey Super Bowl Week interviews.

On Channel 11, Tony Siragusa delivered a nifty sound bite, telling the media hordes: "I'm so intimidated by all you skinny geeks."(Yep, we know what Tony will be doing when he retires. Ambassador Siragusa. Has a nice ring to it.)

Channel 2 actually provided the best analysis of Lewis' adventures with the national media on its 5:30 segment, with sports anchors Scott Garceau and Keith Mills agreeing the Ravens star linebacker had weathered the initial storm as well as could be expected.

At a little after 6 came a golden moment in Super Bowl hype. A WJZ promo breathlessly informed us that SkyChopper 13 would have exclusive aerial coverage of the Ravens' bus smacking that police car Monday as the team made its way to the airport for the flight to Tampa.

Sure enough, a few seconds later we saw the police car being forced into the jersey wall, where the poor cop rode up on two wheels like Popeye Doyle in "The French Connection."

Upon learning the cop wasn't seriously hurt, the Couch Potato got misty-eyed.

Is this a great country or what?

You think they're seeing this stuff in North Korea?

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