Describiing life in Baltimore in one line


October 26, 1998|By DAN RODRICKS

Readers of This Just In continue to fill in the blank - "You know you're from Baltimore if ..." - with one-liners that, laid end to end, form the perimeter of life within the Greater Patapsco Drainage Basin. (That's a mouthful, ain't it?)

Barbara McCourt: "You know you're from Baltimore if a tourist in Fells Point asks you where Thames Street is, pronouncing it, 'Tems,' and you reply: 'In London, hon.'"

Bob Kraft: "You know you're from Baltimore if you think the real reason the Orioles had such a lousy season was that Rick 'That Yankee' Cerone was in the broadcast booth."

Tyson Kautsch: "You're from Baltimore if you've ever eaten warm Utz potato chips from a paper bag in Cross Street Market, and loved it."

Wait, there's more!

You know you're from Baltimore if ...

Craig Hankin: "You can still remember that first time Abe Sherman threw you out of his Park Avenue newsstand for excessive browsing. ('The Pratt Library is around the corner, sonny!')... You've ever dined at Martick's on a hot summer evening and seen owner-chef-grand vizier Morris Martick emerge from the kitchen wearing nothing but an apron."

Gary Witherspoon: "You have at least one cousin with a front gold tooth. ... You remember Koester's Bakery on Lexington Street. ... You saw 'Tales From The Crypt' at the Harlem Theater. ... You don't see anything strange about the name Dru Hill." (And you know you're from Baltimore if you think of young guys singing at the Fudgery in Harborplace when you hear that name.)

KCB (by e-mail): "After 30 years of marriage, your wife's family on the Eastern Shore still treats you like a foreigner."

Pepper4 (e-mail): "Crab mallets have a permanent place in your cutlery drawer."

Bob Ritchie: "You see the traffic light turn red a block away but speed up anyway. ... You believe you'll wear out your turn signal if you use it too much."

Ellen Karp: "You went to Maria's in Little Italy for your prom dinner. ... Your family's Thanksgiving turkey came from Scheeler's in Lexington Market. ... Your school picnic was a day trip aboard the Bay Belle to Tolchester or Betterton."

Tom Conway: "You remember when Ron Smith was a TV anchorman. ... You remember when Rash Field was a football field. ... You knew ground balls never went through the left side of the infield, with Brooksie and Belanger there."

Several readers have noted an irony in the name of the development in White Marsh called "The Avenue," that contrived Main Street planted at the edge of a massive parking lot near a mall. You know you're really from Baltimore, readers say, if you hear someone mention "The Avenue" and think instead of either 36th Street, Hampden, or Pennsylvania Avenue, on the west side. Some readers think of Eastern Avenue in Highlandtown, as simply, "The Avenue." Mike Griffin of Bel Air says people in Pigtown used to refer to Washington Boulevard as "The Avenue."

Johnny Dark, legendary Baltimore radio disc jockey who will be honored Nov. 9 at the Belvedere Hotel with a lifetime achievement award from Maryland radio stations and the March of Dimes, says: "You know you're from Baltimore if you hear the word 'nocturne' and think of Charles Purcell reading poetry with organ accompaniment on WCAO-AM." Thanks for the memory, Johnny D. Sorry we missed that one.

Star-struck in Baltimore

Richard Gere, Julia Roberts & Co. were on location for "Runaway Bride" over the weekend at the White House crossroads, Mount Carmel and Falls, in northern Baltimore County. Scenes were shot in the rear of Fifth District Elementary School - Gere and Roberts play characters who have a romantic encounter along a driveway near a cornfield, we hear - and at the old Sparks general store. The weekend shoot of "Bride" started at 7:30 p.m. Friday and did not end until 6:30 a.m. Saturday. At Countryside carryout, Larry Carrico was a tad disappointed the stars weren't allowed to have one of his tasty milkshakes. (Maybe they're watching their caloric intake, paisano.) Scenes for "Guarding Tess" and "12 Monkeys" were filmed outside Carrico's place, and both times one of his milkshakes reached the stars. "My wife, Margie, made a strawberry milkshake for Bruce Willis when he was here working on '12 Monkeys,' and he gave it the ol' thumbs-up."

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