As election nears, it's time to take off the gloves

October 08, 1998|By KEVIN COWHERD

WITH THE gubernatorial campaign in full swing and negative commercials filling the airwaves, can these attack ads be far behind?

Sauerbrey No. 1

Ellen Sauerbrey can run from her environmental record. But she can't hide.

She voted against the Clean Air Act, against the ban on phosphates. Now she's outdone herself.

Guess where she's building her new summer home on the bay?

Right. Smack in the prime nesting area for the great blue heron.

And when a local conservation group pointed out a mound of brush containing six of the wading birds' eggs, Ms. Sauerbrey responded: "Tough. That's where the hot tub goes."

Ellen Sauerbrey.

Bad for the blue heron.

Bad for the environment.

Bad for Maryland.

Glendening No. 1

Parris Glendening claims he's tough on crime.

That's a good one.

Because on a recent tour of Maryland's maximum-security prisons, all the governor did was moan about how tough prisoners have it.

Now he wants climate-controlled cells with individual thermostats.

He wants a kiosk on each cellblock where coffee, juice and fresh bagels are sold.

He wants La-Z-Boys in the TV room.

Let's not even mention the 18-hole championship golf courses the governor wants to build at each facility -- with your tax dollars.

Parris Glendening.

If he's tough on crime, we'd hate to see a cream puff.

Sauerbrey No. 2

Ellen Sauerbrey says she cares deeply about the children of Maryland.

She sure has a funny way of showing it.

During a visit to an orphanage last Christmas, she was asked to say a few words to cheer up the children.

She cheered them up, all right.

"There is no Santa Claus!" Ellen Sauerbrey said.

The children started crying. The Republican candidate for governor just laughed.

Then she left for dinner with fat-cat developers who planned to bulldoze the playground next door and put up a strip mall.

Ellen Sauerbrey.

Let's face it: she's too mean to run Maryland.

Glendening No. 2

When it comes to education, Parris Glendening just doesn't get it, does he?

How about his performance at the state symposium on grade-school learning disorders?

After fidgeting in his seat for 20 minutes, the governor glanced at his watch and said: "Look, this is all very interesting. But I plan to be home in time for 'Baywatch.' "

Call us reactionary.

But we think Maryland deserves a governor who cares more about our schools than bimbos jiggling on a beach.

Sauerbrey No. 3

When it comes to guns, Ellen Sauerbrey is Maryland's answer to Annie Oakley.

Now we hear she wants to lower the minimum age for a legal handgun purchase from 21 to 7.

And get this. Instead of firearms being sold at licensed gun shops, Ms. Sauerbrey proposes they be sold anywhere: in supermarkets, drug stores, even your corner deli.

That's right. Now when your second-grader ducks into the Rite-Aid on his way home from school, he just might come out with M&M's and a shiny new Smith & Wesson.

Ellen Sauerbrey.

Where does she think she is?

This is Maryland. Not the wild, wild West.

Glendening No. 3

Over and over we hear the same thing: Parris Glendening is the best friend senior citizens have.

But is he?

At a recent Democratic fund-raiser, he responded to a question on Social Security by barking: "You greedy geezers are all alike, you know that?"

Later, in the buffet line, he elbowed in front of a man with a walker and hissed: "C'mon, old-timer. We'd all like a shot at the potato salad."

That sure doesn't sound like a friend of the elderly to us.

Parris Glendening.

With a friend like that, who needs enemies?

Pub Date: 10/08/98

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