HEY, MOM, WANT to hear something funny? My French teacher wanted to know if we would host a foreign exchange student. Isn't that hysterical?" my youngest son said.
My indignant reply was muted by the laughter from the rest of the family.
"I told him after four weeks of living with our family, a French guy would go home with a new understanding of our nation's dependency on Prozac," my son continued.
Carefully choosing my words, I tried to explain that he was perhaps exaggerating. Granted our family discussions can be lively, but with three teen-age boys in the house I'm usually pleased we don't end up on a "Cops" episode.
"What about feeding him? Will he return to France under the impression that the sole use of the kitchen is to house the phone used to call for pizza delivery?" my child asked.
"And then there's the soccer factor. If he mentions the World Cup, can you promise not to refer to it as 'that sport where the men wear silk shorts and knee-highs, then kick at each other'?" He was positively gleeful.
I assured my son that I could manage to behave in an appropriate fashion if the opportunity arose.
"I know you believe that, but the bottom line " he paused and lowered his voice. "Can you promise not to start accusing the French of perpetuating Jerry Lewis' career?"
On second thought, maybe we should welcome a stray cat instead, Glen Burnie.
Preparations for the 50th anniversary celebration of Point Pleasant Shoreland Improvement Association will top the agenda the organization's meeting, 7: 30 p.m. tomorrow at Church of the Good Shepherd, 1451 Furnace Ave.
The association has planned an oyster and bull roast for members and their guests Nov. 1 at La Fontaine Bleu. Tickets are available and can be purchased at the meeting.
Association President Robert Everhart will address nominations for the annual election of officers scheduled for the November meeting and announce the recipients of the group's scholarship fund.
Information on the anniversary dinner: Bud Valenti, 410-766-4310.
Lost in the '50s
A local Boy Scout troop for youth with special needs will benefit from a car show and flea market sponsored by the Lost in the '50s Custom Car Club of Maryland, noon to 4 p.m. Sunday, at Sicily's Pizza, 2301 Dorsey Road.
The event is free to the public and will raise money for Boy Scout Troop 216 through vehicle registration and vendor fees.
Richard Mooney, car club president, expects hundreds of antique cars, street rods and custom cars will be on view with the sounds of golden oldie music.
Activities will include auctions, raffles and games. Refreshments will be sold throughout the day.
Registration for vendors begins at 7 a.m. and continues through the noon start. Vehicle registration begins at 9 a.m.
Information: Bob Eveson, 410-768-0872 or Sally Evans, 410-224-6406.
There's no car, antique or otherwise, so dirty the musicians of Arthur Slade Regional Catholic School's Advanced Band can't handle the challenge at its annual carwash, 10 a.m. to 4 p.m. Sunday at the Roy Rogers in Cromwell Fields Shopping Center at Dorsey Road and Baltimore-Annapolis Blvd.
Donations of $5 for cars and $7 for vans and trucks will be used for the award-winning band's general fund.
If the weather is bad, the carwash will be rescheduled for Sept. 20.
Meet the candidates
An opportunity to meet the candidates is on the agenda for a meeting of the District 32 Democratic Club, 8 p.m. tomorrow at Ferndale Senior Center on Baltimore-Annapolis Boulevard. Democratic candidates for county and state offices have been invited to address the concerns of their constituents before the Sept. 15 primary election.
Club members and their guests are welcome to attend a casual cookout starting at 7 p.m.
Information: Tom Dixon, 410-987-5299 or Evelyn Kellner, 410-969-9325.
Reading tutors sought
Anne Arundel County Literacy Council is seeking tutors for adult nonreaders. An affiliate of Laubach Literacy Action, the council needs volunteers to work one on one to help adults improve their reading skills.
Interested volunteers need to take a 12-hour training workshop scheduled for Sept. 26 and Oct. 3 at North County Library. A $15 fee includes materials, membership in the council and refreshments.
Before attending the workshop, volunteers can learn more about the reading program by attending one of the following orientation sessions -- today and Sept. 16, 23 and 30 at the council's Glen Burnie office, Suite 603 in the Empire Towers, 7310 Ritchie Highway. Volunteers can attend the noon or 7: 30 p.m. orientation.
Information: 410-553-0809 or 410-269-4474.
Pub Date: 9/09/98