A little ditty from e-mail brings smile

July 06, 1998|By Dru Sefton | Dru Sefton,KANSAS CITY STAR

If you have an e-mail account, you may have chuckled over one of these ditties.

Call them Web witticisms if you will, because there's really no name for them. They're amusing little electronic tidbits that ricochet all over the Internet as recipients guffaw and e-mail them on to their pals.

Where do they come from? Who knows? Where did the first "knock-knock" joke come from?

So in case you've missed them, or if you're not yet part of the computer revolution, here are some especially strange ones:

You can't trust dogs to watch your food.

If corn oil comes from corn, where does baby oil come from?

Do not walk behind me, for I may not lead. Do not walk ahead of me, for I may not follow. Do not walk beside me, either, just leave me alone!

Time is what keeps everything from happening at once.

When you find yourself getting irritated with someone, try to remember that all men are brothers - and just give them a noogie.

Puppies still have bad breath after eating a TicTac.

Why do they call it a TV set when you only get one?

Follow your dreams! Unless it's the one where you're at work in your underwear during a fire drill.

Never hold a Dustbuster and a cat at the same time.

Give me ambiguity or give me something else.

If you don't like my driving, don't call anyone. Just take another road. That's why the highway department made so many of them.

Never sneeze when someone is cutting your hair.

What was the best thing before sliced bread?

This land is your land, this land is my land. So stay on your land!

Always remember you're unique, just like everyone else.

Never ask your 3-year-old brother to hold a tomato.

Pub Date: 7/06/98

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