Columnist's secret thoughts revealed!

March 01, 1998|By Susan Reimer

NEWSWEEK magazine reported today that it has obtained transcripts of tape-recorded conversations between Sun columnist Susan Reimer and herself.

Apparently unable to get her husband and children to listen to her, Reimer has been thinking out loud recently, the newsweekly reported, and her so-called dearest friends have been recording her comments in an apparent attempt to bolster their own grand jury testimony and to protect themselves against any future appearances in her column.

Special prosecutor Kenneth Starr has notified Reimer that she is the target of an investigation triggered by members of her family, who claim that she has made gifts to them of ties, books of poetry, clothing from Old Navy and incredibly expensive sports shoes in an attempt to secure their silence during future efforts to get everybody out of the house on time in the morning.

Reimer has denied doing anything improper with her relations, but was seen dining with high-powered legal counsel in a private room in one of the best restaurants in town. She has refused to comment on the allegations against her until all the facts are known, but has changed her hairstyle anyway.

Here are excerpts from the Reimer transcripts, dubbed "True Facts" by the tabloid press:

* University of Florida psychologist Benjamin Karney has theorized, after studying 27 years of research data, that people most likely to express happiness in their marriage over time were those who use their memory selectively to feel that the present is better than the past.

"When it comes to marital happiness, it's good to be able to tell tell yourself a story you like to believe," Karney said. "And so, it's OK not to be accurate about the past if it makes you feel better about the present."

* Georgia Gov. Zell Miller has proposed to spend $105,000 to provide the parents of every newborn with a classical music cassette or compact disc in order to boost the infant's intelligence later in life. He was responding to a study that showed college students' IQ scores increased after listening to a Mozart piano sonata for 10 minutes.

* Maybe all a good marriage is is a mutual yearning to stay together.

* Barbie has had more than a billion pairs of shoes since her creation in 1959.

* Americans spent $209.5 billion dining out last year, about equally divided between places where you are asked if you'd like an appetizer and places where you are asked you if you'd like fries.

* Surveying its guests, Homewood Suites found that 59 percent believe they travel the right amount for their business. Thirty-six percent said they travel too much and 5 percent said they travel too little. But 53 percent said their spouses or significant others believe they're traveling too much.

* The more expensive your jewelry, the more likely it is to be thought fake.

* A study published in the Archives of Neurology reports that as people get older, the male brain shrinks faster than the female brain. The men in the study were not demented, and their ability to concentrate was said to be fine. When asked to explain this, author Edward Coffey told the New York Times: "It may be that men are better able to tolerate brain shrinkage without showing the effects."

* Most women -- 88 percent, according to a survey conducted by HTC a lingerie manufacturer -- are not willing to sacrifice comfort for sexiness when purchasing a bra. Another 3 percent don't know, or are not sure.

* American law historically recognizes privileged communication

between doctors and patients, lawyers and clients, clergy and parishioner and husband and wife, but communication between parents and children is not protected.

So much for keeping those lines of communication open. Parents -- don't ask if you don't want to be forced to tell.

* If you think you have everything under control, you need to take a look at what you mean by "everything."

* This from Jon Kardatzke, author of "Marriage Can Be Fun": This week, think of one thing that makes your spouse happy. And do it!

* Children behave like the adults who raise them.

* The best recipes are the ones that conclude with these instructions: "Combine all ingredients in a 3-quart casserole and bake one hour at 350 degrees."

* Americans spend an average of 10 fewer hours each week doing housework than people did two decades ago, according to the Survey Research Center at the University of Maryland, and another survey reports that 81 percent of women interviewed say their homes aren't as clean as their mother's was.

The only consolation is that our daughters will probably also say, when surveyed, that they are much worse housekeepers than we were, and they will remember our houses as much cleaner than they actually are.

* One man will never ask another if a certain article of clothing makes him look fat.

* Sending flowers is not his idea, but the skillful transplanting of one of her ideas.

And the truest True Fact of all:

* If you assume that your child cares about his life and wants it to turn out well, you will both be better for it.

Pub Date: 3/24/98

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