So you assume the big topic of conversation at Redskin Park this week was about Cary Conklin and the wounded offensive line.
You would be wrong.
The real topic of conversation was the juicy stuff -- the subject that was the lead story on the 6 o'clock news in Washington on Wednesday and made the New York tabloids. Of course, it was the arrest of Jack Kent Cooke's fourth wife, Marlena, (described in a New York tabloid as a "Bolivian Bombshell") on a drunken-driving charge.
They had videotape of her on TV being hauled into the police station in a black cocktail dress with her hands handcuffed behind her back. She also was reported to have thrown her gold pumps at a police officer, striking him in the face, when he suggested she remove them for better balance during a field sobriety test.
On top of all this, there was a 26-year-old man named Patrick Wermer clinging to the hood of her car. His role in all this wasn't known, but a New York tabloid described him as a "reputed beau."
Shouldn't all this be in a made-for-TV movie? Or a chapter in "Lifestyles of the Rich and Famous"? You know what F. Scott Fitzgerald said about the rich: They're different from you and me.
What we don't know is Cooke's reaction to all this. But Cooke is unpredictable and he's not talking so we probably won't get a clue until Oct. 10 -- the date of the Redskins' next home game. That's when we'll find out if she has her usual spot in Cooke's box.
Now back to football, which can't quite match the Cooke saga. This is the start of the bye weekends, so there are only 10 games scheduled and you can see five of them if you have cable -- four if you don't. That should be enough.
Washington at Philadelphia (-5) -- Will the Redskins pack enough body bags this time?
* Take Washington * Final score: Eagles 17, Redskins 16 Detroit at New Orleans (-5) -- How long will it take Barry Sanders to announce he wants to make more than Emmitt Smith?
* Take New Orleans * Final score: Saints 28, Lions 14 Cincinnati at Pittsburgh (-8 1/2 ) -- Barry Foster wasn't the second- highest-paid running back in pro football very long.
* Take Pittsburgh * Final score: Steelers 23, Bengals 7 Los Angeles Rams at New York Giants (-7) -- Did Wellington Mara get to draw up his own schedule this year?
* Take New York * Final score: Giants 27, Rams 13 Seattle at New England (-2 1/2 ) -- Bledsoe vs. Mirer is a matchup we may see a lot of over the years.
* Take New England * Final score: Patriots 24, Seahawks 17 Atlanta at San Francisco (-13) -- Who were those players wearing San Francisco uniforms Monday night?
* Take San Francisco * Final score: 49ers 31, Falcons 10 Cleveland at Los Angeles Raiders (-3 1/2 ) -- They showed the Raiders highlight film on ESPN last week. It began with the highlight of the Raiders' season -- Al Davis' induction into the Hall of Fame. Well, it was Davis' highlight.
* Take Cleveland * Final score: Browns 27, Raiders 14 Houston at San Diego (-2 1/2 ) -- Were the Chiefs afraid to play Joe Montana against Buddy Ryan's defense last week?
F: * Take San Diego * Final score: Chargers 21, Oilers 10
Dallas (-6 1/2 ) at Phoenix -- Does Emmitt Smith's return mean that Kevin Williams will stop dropping punts?
F: * Take Phoenix * Final score: Cowboys 21, Cardinals 20
Denver at Kansas City (-6) -- The last time Joe Montana faced John Elway, the score was 55-10 in the Super Bowl. But Montana is 0-3 against Denver in the regular season and coach Marty Schottenheimer is 2-9 against Elway. Can Montana pretend it's a Super Bowl?
* Take Denver * Final score: Broncos 24, Chiefs 21 Byes:
Minnesota, Chicago, Tampa Bay, Green Bay, Miami, New York Jets, Indianapolis and Buffalo.
@4 Best bets: Saints, Steelers, Cardinals and 49ers
Last week's record: 8-6. Against the spread: 8-6. Best bets: 0-4.
OC Season record: 21-7. Against the spread: 18-10. Best bets: 2-6.