A filmgoer's guide to those irritating, terrifying creatures of the dark GLEN BURNIE

NEIGHBORS

June 16, 1993|By BONITA FORMWALT

First it was that Barney guy, giving everyone cavities with his sweetness. Now it's Steven Spielberg and his T-Rex scaring the socks off movie patrons. Personally, I'll opt for the people-eating dinos every time.

So that our children could be on the cutting edge of movie history, we cashed in their savings bonds and journeyed to the theater to see "Jurassic Park." Two hours and $47 later, I offer the following suggestion: wait for the video.

It's not that this is a bad movie. Actually it is a very good movie. No, the problem is that you have to share the theater with other people.

This is where it gets a little ugly. For the true monsters aren't on the screen, they're in the audience. For example:

* The Munchosaurus: Distinguished by his diet of popcorn swimming in that yellow substitute butter-like goo, an army of Gummi Bears, nachos with a side order of nondairy cheese liquid and a quart of Diet Coke. This dinosaur should always nest on an aisle seat but never does.

* The Know-It-Allsaurus: A social creature, he always travels in packs, has read the book three times and knows every plot twist and surprise. As he shares this information with anyone seated within the sound of his voice, we're left wondering where the tar pits are when we need them.

* The Politically-Correctasaurus: Stops periodically to share insights with a small Politically-Correctasaurus-to-be, i.e. "Honey, did you notice that one of the scientists is a woman?" or "You are what you eat, sweetheart. See how cranky the carnivores are. It's that red meat problem."

* The Tyrannosaurus Tap: Nests directly behind the most easily annoyed woman in the theater. As the tension on screen increases, so does the tapping of his foot on the back of my . . . her chair. Tapping, tapping, tapping. . . . This species is now extinct.

Evolve on, Glen Burnie.

*

Holy Trinity Catholic Church members turned out Sunday to say thank you and goodbye to the Rev. H. Martin Hammond. About 2,500 people came to wish Father Marty well as he prepares to leave for an extended study program.

Father Marty will go to Belgium for five months of study followed by an additional five months in Boston.

For weeks, members of the parish have been collecting photos, drawings and anecdotes that religious education teacher Jackie Coyle preserved in a scrapbook for the priest to take with him.

Father Marty's tenure at Holy Trinity will be marked by the recently completed church renovation.

"He took the church and tried to return it to its original form when it was built [in 1931]," parish manager Bill Binder said. "It took almost two years. Almost everything was redone, even the stained glass windows were returned."

The Rev. Eugene Nichol will take over as pastor of Holy Trinity effective July 1.

*

Tickets are still available for a chance to win a classic 1978 sports Mustang as part of a fund-raiser for the Maryland Manor Convalescent Center in Marley. Only 200 tickets will be sold at $20 each.

The classic car was given to the center as a gift from Dorothy Rockel of Rockel Enterprises. "She saw we were always raising funds for different projects and that we were always nickel and diming our way to get the money," said center activity director Sherril Rundle. "With this we can raise a large sum of money all at once."

Sunday is the projected drawing date. For ticket information, call 768-8200.

*

Area teen-agers are invited to attend "Teen Game Night," 7 p.m. to 9 p.m. tomorrow at the Parke West Recreation Area I, Parkland Place and Darien Drive.

Co-sponsored by the Parke West Homeowners Association and county Department of Recreation and Parks, the evening's activities are free and open to youths ages 13-19.

Scheduled activities include volleyball, horseshoes, tetherball, and table games. Refreshments will be available.

This is the first of several game nights planned for the summer. Scheduled dates are June 24, July 8, July 22 and Aug. 5.

For additional information, call 787-0497.

*

The search for the past continues in Glen Burnie with the History and Genealogy Library, 5 Crain Highway South. Located in the former Kuethe Library, it is a combined project of the county Historical Society and the Genealogy Society.

Staffed by head librarian Mary Myers and several volunteers, the library is open from 10 a.m to 4 p.m., Thursday through Saturday. The volunteers help visitors locate information about their ancestors.

Murray Combs, a volunteer genealogist, has assisted the organization in acquiring almost 300 new volumes for Glen Burnie's library. "The Peabody Library turned over their genealogical information to the Maryland Historical Society. All the duplicate material was then sold to members of the society," he explained. "I had permission to spend $1,000 over the normal allotment. I was able to buy books that added significantly to our current holdings."

Of particular interest was the acquisition of 54 volumes of the Census Index, a general starting point for tracing a family tree. Other information available includes records dating back as far as 1790.

For additional information, call 760-9679.

*

Pit beef, barbecued pork and chicken, sausages, vegetables, salads, beer and soft drinks: the menu for Holy Trinity Council's Knights of Columbus Bull Roast includes something for everyone. Scheduled from 7 p.m. to midnight Saturday at the Columbian Center, the roast is a fund-raiser for the Knights' charity fund.

Admission is $20 per person and includes dinner and dancing. For ticket information, call 987-1816 or 766-5607.

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