Questions, like Westhead points, abound

Phil Jackman

April 08, 1993|By Phil Jackman

Pssssst:

* Now that Paul Westhead of Loyola Marymount fame has taken over the reins of the George Mason University basketball team, what are they going to do with the 45-second clocks?

* Seriously, folks, is deportation enough of a penalty for columnist Dan Rodricks' even suggesting that Camden Yards needs an organist?

* With Dino Ciccarelli in Detroit and John Druce in Winnipeg, who are the Washington Capitals going to look to for scoring in the NHL playoffs?

* Is there even a remote chance that John Riggins will ever grow up?

* Paul O'Neill troops in from a branch town like Cincinnati and he's making more dough than Don Mattingly this year playing for the Yankees?

* Why are women basketball coaches so grim? Here they were closing in on a national title and nearly every one of them appeared as if they were headed for the gallows.

* With President Clinton pulling into Baltimore for Monday's Orioles-Texas opener by train, why was it necessary to shut off exits on the expressways and close off a couple of city streets, spoiling the day for many fans even before it started?

* With so many high school basketball players going through life and death to score 700 on the SATs, facilitating their move to college ball, isn't it rather counter-productive to have them parading around the country playing all-star games throughout April after a 35-game season?

* Shouldn't all baseball games scheduled during the first couple of weeks of April be played during the day?

* Is the Hall of Fame Bowl serious, agreeing to sift through the Big Ten bric-a-brac for a team after the conference has supplied the raw material for the Rose, Citrus and Holiday bowls? If this keeps up, Northwestern is apt to go bowling one of these days.

* Does it strike you as odd that on the one hand they're pushing for women to be allowed in combat while on the other they complain about women playing on successive days at the NCAA hoops showdown?

* Didn't you think hell would freeze over before Joe DiMaggio would show up on the QVC Network pushing hideously overpriced baseball memorabilia?

* What could Reggie White possibly do as a defensive end in Green Bay this season to earn the $9 million salary/bonus the Pack is paying him?

* Why can't all baseball games be played with the dispatch of Monday's openers, which averaged just under two hours and 30 minutes with four of them finished off in 2:19?

* Wait a minute, 10 technical fouls are called on a play involving Patrick Ewing (Knicks vs. Heat) and no one ends up heading for the police station on an assault and battery charge?

* After pitching well in winter ball and having a fine spring training, and considering the Atlanta Braves are paying his huge salary for the season, might it not be worthwhile for the Orioles at least to give former relief star Mark Davis a look-see?

* How shocking is it to find out that Cal Ripken is not the highest paid shortstop in the Bigs? Barry Larkin of the Reds owns that distinction.

* Is it possible that during all the pre-Masters golf tournament hype the name of former two-time winner

Seve Ballesteros came up just once on wire dispatches?

* Just how much money has the Maryland Stadium Authority got to spend and how many more people is it going to take aboard in the quest for an NFL expansion franchise?

* In the long run, do you think Chris Webber will pick up the nickname "Bonehead" for his call for a timeout during the college hoops title game as baseballer Fred Merkle did a few years back?

* Did you know that prior to beating Kansas and Wilt Chamberlain in three overtimes in a famous NCAA tournament final in 1957, North Carolina was required to go three overtimes to get by Michigan State in the semis?

* Isn't it about time to get rid of all the black cats roaming the barns at Pimlico, seeing how the place is obviously cursed with three serious accidents in just four days?

* Opening Day, Brady Anderson slaps an easy two-hopper that the second sacker of Texas (Bill Ripken) sits down on and he's given a hit. Is he leading a charmed life or what?

* Every time you see Gene Upshaw or Donald Fehr (executive directors of the baseball and football players associations, respectively) on the tube, don't you get the impression they're sore winners?

* I know a lot of this is old hat for Nolan Ryan, starting his 27th season on the mound for the Rangers, but wasn't it worth a plane ride to take part in the Presidential Opener here the other day? Noley was in Florida pitching batting practice Monday, preparing for Texas' home opener tomorrow.

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