A zany year behind, all right!

Carol F. Rosenberg

December 31, 1992|By Carol F. Rosenberg

We conclude '92 with a sign of relief,

There was laughter and pain, jubilation and grief.

Somalian warlords agreed not to feud,

Depriving the starving of shipments of food.

Outsiders refused to take action to curb

The carnage of Moslem, Croatian and Serb.

Russia is still an impoverished nation,

Yeltsin's had problems with privatization.

Conditions in Deutschland are not hotsy-totsy,

As Hitler's ghost lives as today's neo-Nazi.

The Lebanon border is far from serene,

Some mighty deep problems face Yitzhak Rabin.

The Middle East peace talks like snails are progressing

As PLO input prevents acquiescing.

Elizabeth Two has agreed to pay taxes,

The hard-working public in England relaxes.

The British royal family's had many a hassle

Including the blazes that wrecked Windsor Castle.

And marital problems, both Fergie's and Di's,

Make the world wonder if monarchy's wise.

Albertville sports had us glued to TV's,

Watching sledders and skaters and racers on skis.

Great runners and swimmers and divers fantastic

Were matched by performers with genius gymnastic.

Election excitement absorbed the U.S.

It lasted for months, should have taken much less.

Harkin, Brown, Kerry and Clinton and Tsongas

Competed in primaries. Cost was humongous.

Surprise of the moment was T. Ross Perot

With hordes of supporters and plenty of dough.

George Bush struggled hard in the wake of the Gipper,

Facing Clinton and Hillary, Al Gore and Tipper.

Quayle's family values were high on the list.

Murphy had Danny boy shaking his fist.

Debates were a problem: the place and the format.

And Bush was no patsy, "Slick Willy" no doormat.

Recession plagued Bush like a dog with the mange,

While Clinton made hay with his catchword, a "change."

Buchanan and Robertson, two right-wing "Pats,"

Had liberal Republicans changing their hats.

Orator Jackson was largely ignored

(But after election was welcomed aboard.)

Scientists warn us our globe's getting warm,

And American health care cries out for reform.

The showgirl who went to his room with Mike Tyson

Got more than she bargained for: cake plus the icin'.

The rendezvous wasn't recorded on tape,

But Mike is in prison, convicted of rape.

The course of true love between Woody and Farrow

Was not, you might say, quite as straight as an arrow.

Tailhook made news, now American women'll

Know sex harassment -- the Navy's -- is criminal.

Rodney King's "innocent" verdict in May

Caused arson and riots and deaths in L.A.

Spike Lee received praise for his film, "Malcolm X,"

While Madonna got lots of exposure for "Sex."

Her book's sealed in Mylar, one buys it uncut.

At 50 bucks per, she will clean up on smut.

The Endeavor's crew weightlessly managed to fix

And return to its orbit the Intelsat Six.

Lil E. won the Derby and Pine Bluff the Preakness,

The Birds started strong but developed some weakness.

The Free State quite soon will inaugurate keno,

game they've been playing for years out in Reno.

Fischer beat Spassky in tournament chess.

Agassi won in conservative dress.

The Orioles christened their stadium luxe.

It drew to capacity, netting big bucks.

Cal Ripken kept Baltimore fans in suspense,

But finally signed for a salary immense.

Frank, Bernstein and City Fair now are defunct.

The schools were found wanting: Too many

kids flunked.

The abortion rights item we called Question 6

Was passed in a landslide despite dirty tricks.

Pro-lifers are going through legal contortions

To ban use of tissue that came from abortions.

State lotteries flourish, they bring in the gold.

Jeff Levitt of Old Court will soon be paroled.

Don Schaefer went west to give George Bush a boost.

Oy, what a furor this "treason" produced!

The Aquarium's first baby dolphin was born.

Notables died, and their passing we mourn:

"Our Gang's" Hal Roach, early comedy name,

Marlene Dietrich of "Blue Angel" fame.

Dame Judith Anderson, star of the stage,

Freddie Bartholomew, star at young age.

Begin of Israel, who won't be forgot

For the pact that was made between him and Sadat.

Harry Orlinsky, whose Bible bore fruits,

Acuff of songs, Alex Haley of "Roots."

Willy Brandt, German leader of liberal mold,

Hurrah for George Abbott -- a hundred years old.

We're thankful that there was no warfare atomic,

And pray '93 will bring more news that's comic.

Carol F. Rosenberg writes from Baltimore.

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