Dear Stadium Doctor:I am a season-ticket holder with a...

Stadium Doctor

May 24, 1992

Dear Stadium Doctor:

I am a season-ticket holder with a major complaint about the food available at our wonderful new stadium. I am a heart patient restricted to a low-fat, low-cholesterol, no-salt diet.

If I want to eat while at the ballpark, it must be with food I bring from my home. Surely, one of the many food stands at our stadium could provide food that I and others on similar, restricted diets could eat.

I would appreciate your help in this matter.

Jennie R. Umstot

Essex

Dear Jennie R. Umstot:

In my capacity as director of the Stadium Doctor Longevity Center and Dude Ranch, I've frequently been asked this excellent question. I'm also asked whether David Janssen ever won an Emmy for his portrayal of Richard Kimball in "The Fugitive," but that's another story.

You're right. It isn't easy finding healthy stuff at the ballpark. But try a little and you'll find some menu items that even would be welcome on Jack LaLane's dinner plate: salads, soups and even lean, carved meat sandwiches.

The thing to keep in mind is that the ballpark food servers base their menu decisions almost entirely on demand. So until fans clamor for a wider selection of healthy grub -- bean sprouts, tofu Jell-O, to name a couple -- they probably won't get it.

*

Dear Stadium Doctor:

I came to purchase tickets for advance games. The line was long and in the open. It clouded up and started to rain slightly. Can't something be done to put a cover over the place where people have to wait to get a ticket?

John J. Goodman

Dundalk

Dear John J. Goodman:

I'm afraid I have nothing but bad news for you, which pains me very much, considering you went down to the ballpark to get tickets and ended up looking like you got caught under a lawn sprinkler.

I asked around to see if anybody had thought about putting up an awning to protect people like you. The answer was that this wasn't in the plans and probably wouldn't be considered any time soon. You might consider a raincoat next time. Or, perhaps, take a cue from Orioles management and let a smile be your umbrella.

*

Dear Stadium Doctor:

In a marriage, a honeymoon could be a short one, a lengthy one or a lifetime. In what category will the Orioles be in at the new ball field?

Joseph T. Kasprzak

Baltimore

Dear Joseph T. Kasprzak:

Because of the rising cost of malpractice insurance, Stadium Doctor regrets he is unable to answer this question.

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