Always thought respectable people scoundrels...

"I HAVE

March 26, 1992

"I HAVE always thought respectable people scoundrels," said Bertrand Russell, "and I look anxiously at my face every morning for signs of my becoming a scoundrel."

We trust he escaped such a dire fate.

* * * WE CAN thank J.B. Priestly for this bit of wisdom: "There was no respect for youth when I was young, and now that I am old, there is not respect for age. I missed it coming and going."

* * * A FRIEND says he doesn't know where he is half the time. Recently he hired a taxi in St. Thomas, American Virgin Islands. The cab radio was tuned to a country-western station -- "Virgin Island Country." On the --, stamped and ready to be mailed to Citibank Maryland, was the driver's monthly Visa card payment.

When he got home, the friend said, his Crown Central gasoline credit card bill was waiting. It was mailed from San Antonio, Texas. The payment was to be sent to Mission, Kans. Crown, of course, is headquartered in Baltimore.

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