Dear Stadium Doctor:
My 3-year-old nursery school class is very excited about the new stadium. We would like to know if there are going to be enough bathrooms for everyone to use, especially since so many new drinks and snacks will be available.
For my part, I would like to know if any of the dreaded "she-inals" are being installed in the women's rest rooms.
If you would be so kind as to answer these questions, we will try to remember to go before we leave the house.
Bolton Hill Nursery
Dear Miss Julia:
Thank you for writing, Miss Julia. And thank you, class, for the handsome painting of the Stadium Doctor standing beside an asparagus tip. Or is that Gumby?
To the class: Listen up, Amanda. You, too, little Jon. The Stadium Doctor is talking to you, Benjamin. There will be plenty of bathrooms for boys and girls at the new ballpark. Twice as many potties for girls as at Memorial Stadium, in fact. If a baby brother arrives at midseason, mommy and daddy will be happy to note that many bathrooms also are equipped with changing tables.
To the teacher: She-inals, the female urinals which created a stir two summers ago, will not be used in the new stadium. Incidentally, this decision had nothing to do with the public outcry when the idea received some media coverage.
Orioles vice president Janet Marie Smith said the team briefly offered to install a prototype at Memorial Stadium, but that the company never responded, so the plan was dropped.
Stadium Authority executive director Bruce Hoffman said there was not a moment when the she-inal was considered for the ballpark. "It was never a part of the project," he said.