Want to learn how to make toast?
Or maybe Frog Eye Salad, Dirt Cake or Enrapture Chicken is more your style.
If so, the "Annapolis Employees' Gourmet Guide" would make a goodChristmas gift in your household.
The 200-page ring-bound notebook is the brainchild of Public Works engineer Margaret Martin, better known as the woman who put the wires underground at state circle thanfor her Betty Crocker tendencies.
"I can't ever do anything that's just straight and dull," Martin said, leafing through the cookbook,which is subtitled, "Towering Tome of Tantalizing Tasties, Ethnicities and Flavourable Formulations."
Martin and Public Works computerdraftsman Paul Lackey, who produced the graphics for the cookbook, put it together during months of lunch hours and after work sessions.
Martin said the hours have been hard, but with just a pinch of silliness to spice up the recipes, the project has been a morale builder.
The cookbook is on sale at City Hall for $12 a copy. All proceeds go to the Annapolis Employees' Fun-D Committee to pay for their annual Christmas party and summer picnic.
Eighty-four city employees submitted recipes, ranging from Frank Biba's "Impress Your Date Dinner," featuring Coq au Vin Francois and instructions to clean your bathroom, to Public Information and Tourism officer Tom Roskelly's "Toast."
The cookbook also contains timeless culinary principles. "Don'tquantify; bakers are artists, not engineers!" writes Rick Dahlgren of Public Works.
A. Former Cook, who is untraceable in city records, suggests a recipe for turkey stuffing with two cups of uncooked popcorn, guaranteed "to blow that turkey's butt right out of the oven."
Rodney Calver of the Mayor's Office also provides a "Salad Recipe for a Honeymoon: Lettuce alone."
Roskelly graciously granted The Anne Arundel County Sun permission to reprint his recipe. Cooks will need two pieces of bread (white, wheat, rye, according to taste) and one stick of butter to prepare this dish.
"Note: You will need an electric toaster for this recipe.
"Place bread in the appropriate slots in the toaster; set toaster for light, medium or dark to suit your taste; engage the toaster.
"When the slices pop up, they are ready to be removed. Apply butter (to) the toast and allow it to melt to a golden brown.
"May be served with jelly, jam, cinnamon, or other topping of your choice; be imaginative.
"Note: for more toast, use additional bread."
Be warned: Roskelly burned one piece and left another raw when he demonstrated his recipe.