Kiner clears the air
New York Mets television announcer Ralph Kiner is enjoying one of the best stretch drives of his career. Here are two great additions to the ever-expanding Kinerism collection:
* Kiner summed up a recent situation where the Mets were trailing the Phillies, 2-1, this way:
"And the Mets," he said, "need at least one run to tie it up."
* Then there was this gem during a Sept. 12 game with the Pirates:
"The reason the Mets have played so well at Shea Stadium this season," Kiner analyzed, "is that they have the best home record in baseball."
They're No. 1
College football is here. If you haven't bought a preseason magazine, you may have made a discovery at your local newsstand or bookstores. There seem to be about 10,000 more publications to pick from. Tip: If you're looking for accuracy in predictions, pick up Game Plan. This magazine won last year's Wyatt Summary, which is the Columbia (Mo.) Tribune's annual poll of polls. For 26 years, the newspaper has graded on a weekly basis the preseason rankings of numerous publications.
Of course, you also could use this annual autumn rite as an excuse to pick up Playboy. It finished No. 5.
Anyone want to fight?
Attention, promoters. For only $10,000 (and possibly less), you can secure the services of heavyweight Jerry Quarry, 45, for your next fight card.
Provided, of course, you can sneak him past a state boxing commission.
Quarry's second attempt to gain a license from the California State Boxing Commission failed Friday, prompting the former contender to claim deprivation of his civil rights and his trainer, Guy Ditmars, to send out an all-points bulletin for a promoter and state commission willing take Quarry as is.
"It's terrible, really terrible," Quarry said of his repeat rejection by the California commission. "It's a violation of my civil rights to deny me the opportunity to do what I do best. Something's awfully wrong in America if this can happen to me. It's age discrimination, pure and simple."
Patty Berg, Ladies Golf Hall of Famer, who is recovering from back surgery: "The doctors tell me I'll be back in the game by 1992. By then I'll be 74 -- just 2-over par."
Buffalo gets an apology
The executive producer of the television show "Coach" apologized for insulting Buffalo, N.Y., during a promo that ran at halftime of Monday night's National Football League telecast.
In the promo, actor Jerry Van Dyke, who plays an assistant coach in the ABC-TV series, said the Buffalo Bills would lose regardless of the final score of their game against the New York Jets.
"Even if you [Buffalo] win, you lose," Van Dyke said. "You still have to go home to Buffalo."
The line prompted dozens of telephone calls to WKBW-TV, ABC's Buffalo affiliate.
Barry Kemp, the series' chief writer and executive producer, said the line was "a thoughtless slip. It was uncalled for."